Top 160 Oliver Markus Malloy Quotes (2024 Update)
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51. “Dear Trumptards, so how are you enjoying the beginning of World War 3 so far? Is it all you hoped it would be?”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

52. “Republican ideology in a nutshell: Some of you will die but that’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

53. “Do flat-earthers believe that other planets are also flat?”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

54. “You’re not the butcher, selling sausages. You’re the cow, pre-sausage.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

55. “Democrats suck at coming up with catchy propaganda slogans, because they don’t think like Nazis.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

56. “Only the present is real. The past and the future exist only in our imagination.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

57. “The Dunning Kruger Effect: Dumb people like Trump don’t know how dumb they are. They don’t even know how much stuff they don’t know. They don’t know that other people know the stuff they don’t know that they don’t know. Dumb people like Trump believe they know everything there is to know.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

58. “You have not had any privacy since the first day you owned your first cell phone. They can track everything. They can hear recordings of anything you have ever said on your cell. And read everything you ever read, and everything you ever typed. And see every location you’ve ever been to. That’s just how cells work. Your privacy is a willful illusion.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

59. “When the rest of the world watches the news from America, they see a third world dumpster fire. A failed state.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

60. “You want to make America great again? Make racism wrong again!”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

61. “The attacks on the US capitol on January 6th, 2021 will have ripple effects for years to come. We’re no longer in the September 11th era. We’re now in the January 6th era.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

62. “I think there’s something seriously wrong with a society that thinks it’s wrong to tell the truth, because it could potentially hurt someone’s feelings. You’re not doing anyone any favors if you don’t allow snowflakes to develop coping skills, by shielding them from uncomfortable thoughts.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

63. “Everything we men do, everything we men have done for the past 100,000 years, is all about attracting a mate. When a guy tries to impress a girl with his fancy car, or his expensive suit, or his gold watch, or his flashy shirt at the club, or he flexes his biceps, or brags about how much money he makes, he’s doing the same thing that animals have done for millions of years. Like a peacock, he’s trying to make himself desirable and to attract a mate.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

64. “If you’re afraid to leave the house unless you’re armed, you don’t need a gun, you need a psychiatrist.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

65. “No, guns were not meant for overthrowing a tyrannical government. Guns were for protecting the tyrannical government against Native Americans and slave uprisings.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

66. “A God that never interferes is indistinguishable from a God that doesn’t exist.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

67. “This, today, right now, will seem like the good old days in 2 weeks. Things are about to get a hell of a lot worse.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

68. “Would three boobs be better than two?”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

69. “Sin more! Otherwise Jesus died for nothing.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

70. “Make racism wrong again.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

71. “You must be a Fox News viewer. Nobody else is dumb enough to believe Trump’s lies.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

72. “Patriotism is a gateway drug to fascism. Tribalism is the gateway to racism.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

73. “Don’t worry about offending people. Any time you write something thought provoking, some idiots will complain, because they hate it when you make them think.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

74. “It’s not the Illuminati or Free Masons or Lizard Aliens who control everything. It’s the Republican Conspiracy that controls and manipulates you with their lies.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

75. “It would appear that a lot of people out there are hiding their own dark, socially unacceptable sexual fantasies behind a facade of fake indignant outrage when someone else gets caught with their pants down.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

76. “The coronavirus pandemic is exactly the kind of cataclysmic event that brings about drastic changes. I think Medicare For All and UBI are now inevitable. It’s either that, or complete chaos.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

77. “Trump’s MAGA minions live in a Fox News bubble.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

78. “People don’t believe in God because it’s true, but because they were the victims of early childhood indoctrination.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

79. “You know what I love about writing non-fiction? The story is already there. I just have to write it down.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

80. “The only people who try to deny the existence of Russian trolls are Russian trolls.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

81. “Why is it so hard for many erotica authors to admit that erotica is porn? Everyone loves porn!”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

82. “The difference between a writer and an author: Writers call each other writers. Readers call writers authors.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

83. “North Korea, the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea, isn’t democratic. The Nazis, the National Socialists, weren’t socialists. And America isn’t the land of the free. It’s all just clever nationalist marketing.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

84. “Medical studies have shown that cursing reduces levels of stress and pain. Repressing your anger is not healthy. It’s much better to verbalize it, and let off steam. Maybe all that repressed anger is the reason why there are so many serial killers in America.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

85. “Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.” Plato “To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” Ralph Waldo Emerson.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

86. “Worshipping a cross is no different than worshipping a tree, a rock, or the stars.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

87. “What is love? Love is when your heart has a raging boner.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

88. “Daily mass killings are a uniquely American problem, because in America every halfwit can get his hands on a gun. You know what angry halfwits do in other countries? They throw potatoes.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

89. “Yo mama so stupid, she watches Fox News and voted for Trump.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

90. “There’s a big overlap between conspiracy theorists, racists, gun nuts, doomsday preppers, fans of the rapture and poor white Republicans. They all have one thing in common: They feel like the oppressed underdogs.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

91. “Claiming to be offended is a great way to elevate yourself at the expense of others: “Look at me! I’m a much better person than you! And I judge you! I condemn you! Shame! Shame! SHAME!”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

92. “The NRA brainwashes you into believing that you need to buy a bunch of guns, to protect yourself from all the people with guns.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

93. “What is evil? Causing others to suffer out of malice.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

94. “I think there is only one way the Covid-19 pandemic is gonna end: The immune will live. The rest will die. We might lose a 5th of the world population.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

95. “Stop calling yourself an authoress. You sound like an idiotess.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

96. “If you like war, be a nationalist. If you like peace, be a citizen of the world.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

97. “It’s pretty simple: If we don’t unite behind Biden, Trump wins. Biden may not be everything we want, but Trump is nothing we want.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

98. “Would Jesus build a wall? Would Mother Teresa? No, of course not. They would welcome the refugees and give them free universal healthcare.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

99. “Most anti-science religious fundamentalist is now in charge of America’s biggest science project.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

100. “People have always been vain. Can you imagine what it was like when some guy invented the first mirror? Maidens probably spent all day and night just staring at their own reflection in the dim candle light of their drafty castle tower, back when the first mirrors were cutting edge technology.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy