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Top 160 Oliver Markus Malloy Quotes (2025 Update)
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Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “If you’ve never had actual freedom, you don’t miss it. You can’t miss what you’ve never had.”

151. “If you’ve never had actual freedom, you don’t miss it. You can’t miss what you’ve never had.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Yo mama so slutty, Trump still owes her hush money.”

152. “Yo mama so slutty, Trump still owes her hush money.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Right wing extremists think the whole world is a leftist conspiracy.”

153. “Right wing extremists think the whole world is a leftist conspiracy.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Nowadays words like “Liberal” and “Muslim” are used by right-wing extremists in the same way as the word “Jew” was used by the right-wing extremists of Nazi Germany.”

154. “Nowadays words like “Liberal” and “Muslim” are used by right-wing extremists in the same way as the word “Jew” was used by the right-wing extremists of Nazi Germany.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “What I admire most about Republicans is that they never run out of lies.”

155. “What I admire most about Republicans is that they never run out of lies.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Democrats care about what’s fair and true. Republicans only care about winning, no matter how much they have to lie and cheat.”

156. “Democrats care about what’s fair and true. Republicans only care about winning, no matter how much they have to lie and cheat.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “I can’t do everything I want, but I can put a smile on my dog’s face. Making him happy makes me happy.”

157. “I can’t do everything I want, but I can put a smile on my dog’s face. Making him happy makes me happy.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “2020 was bad. 2021 is worse.”

158. “2020 was bad. 2021 is worse.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Conformists are boring. Artists are interesting. That’s the difference between a wannabe writer and a real writer.”

159. “Conformists are boring. Artists are interesting. That’s the difference between a wannabe writer and a real writer.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Why ban guns? Let’s give everyone rocket launchers! What could possibly go wrong?”

160. “Why ban guns? Let’s give everyone rocket launchers! What could possibly go wrong?”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “No, coronavirus is not just the flu. It’s highly contagious pneumonia. Covid19 is to the flu what heroin is to aspirin. Vaguely similar, but not at all the same.”

161. “No, coronavirus is not just the flu. It’s highly contagious pneumonia. Covid19 is to the flu what heroin is to aspirin. Vaguely similar, but not at all the same.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “The Covid-19 pandemic is going to be much worse than Pearl Harbor. It’s going to be nationwide, in every city in every state. And it’s going to last for months, not hours. It’s going to be an elephant compared to an ant.”

162. “The Covid-19 pandemic is going to be much worse than Pearl Harbor. It’s going to be nationwide, in every city in every state. And it’s going to last for months, not hours. It’s going to be an elephant compared to an ant.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Dear millennials: Youth is fleeting. Stupid is forever.”

163. “Dear millennials: Youth is fleeting. Stupid is forever.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “When historians in the future ask a really old version of me about this pandemic, I’m gonna tell them that Trump’s MAGA minions were the only ones who had no idea what was happening, while the rest of America stared into the abyss.”

164. “When historians in the future ask a really old version of me about this pandemic, I’m gonna tell them that Trump’s MAGA minions were the only ones who had no idea what was happening, while the rest of America stared into the abyss.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “The sad thing is, Trump’s minions have no idea how dumb they sound when they repeat his lies as if they were true.”

165. “The sad thing is, Trump’s minions have no idea how dumb they sound when they repeat his lies as if they were true.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “If you think of yourself as a follower of Christ’s teachings, if you consider yourself a good person, you are morally obligated to be against greed. It’s your duty as a good person to be against exploitation. It’s your moral duty to be against predatory capitalism.”

166. “If you think of yourself as a follower of Christ’s teachings, if you consider yourself a good person, you are morally obligated to be against greed. It’s your duty as a good person to be against exploitation. It’s your moral duty to be against predatory capitalism.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “The problem with Trump voters is, they’re so dumb, they don’t even know how much stuff they don’t know. They just assume nobody else knows more about evolution or global warming than they do. If they don’t understand how it works, they think nobody understands how it works.”

167. “The problem with Trump voters is, they’re so dumb, they don’t even know how much stuff they don’t know. They just assume nobody else knows more about evolution or global warming than they do. If they don’t understand how it works, they think nobody understands how it works.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Mike Pence, the most anti-science religious fundamentalist in Washington, is now in charge of America’s biggest science project ever: finding a cure for the coronavirus. I think we all better start praying.”

168. “Mike Pence, the most anti-science religious fundamentalist in Washington, is now in charge of America’s biggest science project ever: finding a cure for the coronavirus. I think we all better start praying.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Nationalism among nations is like racism among races.”

169. “Nationalism among nations is like racism among races.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “To the people of Beirut, the post-apocalyptic world of The Umbrella Academy is now a reality. They now live in an obliterated world. From this day forward, they exist in a destroyed world. For them, the End Times just happened.”

170. “To the people of Beirut, the post-apocalyptic world of The Umbrella Academy is now a reality. They now live in an obliterated world. From this day forward, they exist in a destroyed world. For them, the End Times just happened.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Jesus was a socialist.”

171. “Jesus was a socialist.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Men who are willing to do whatever it takes to gain power over others are morally unfit to wield that power.”

172. “Men who are willing to do whatever it takes to gain power over others are morally unfit to wield that power.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “WTF is praying gonna do for Vegas? Apparently God likes mass shootings.”

173. “WTF is praying gonna do for Vegas? Apparently God likes mass shootings.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “Did you ever think one day you’d live through a global pandemic, with a doomsday virus, and the Joker is president? Sounds like a bad made-for-TV scifi movie.”

174. “Did you ever think one day you’d live through a global pandemic, with a doomsday virus, and the Joker is president? Sounds like a bad made-for-TV scifi movie.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “John Oliver, Trevor Noah, Stephen Colbert, Bill Maher and I have the same sense of humor. They’re just better at it than I am.”

175. “John Oliver, Trevor Noah, Stephen Colbert, Bill Maher and I have the same sense of humor. They’re just better at it than I am.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

Oliver Markus Malloy Quote: “If Jesus came back today, Republicans would stop him at the border.”

176. “If Jesus came back today, Republicans would stop him at the border.”

— Oliver Markus Malloy

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