Top 90 Shefali Tsabary Quotes (2024 Update)
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51. “Each of us imagines we are being the best parent we can be, and most of us are indeed good people who feel great love for our children. It certainly isn’t out of a lack of love that we impose our will on our children. Rather, it stems from a lack of consciousness.”

— Shefali Tsabary

52. “The heart of conscious parenting is the ability to be present in any situation that arises. Are you able to respond from a place of awareness rather than attachment? Do you discipline from a place of authenticity or from your ego?”

— Shefali Tsabary

53. “Regret, remorse, guilt, and nostalgia sound so honorable, but they are simply a preoccupation with yesterday.”

— Shefali Tsabary

54. “When we focus on the process, not the outcome, our children develop their innate curiosity, which causes them to show interest on their own initiative. In.”

— Shefali Tsabary

55. “When our children aren’t following “the plan,” we are wise to remind ourselves they aren’t meant to, since this isn’t what they are on earth to do. At such times, we may wish to consider whether we ought to change our plans, instead of always requiring them to abide by our wishes.”

— Shefali Tsabary

56. “Our discomfort with confronting ourselves in the naked stillness of absolute quiet leads us to eat too much, drink excessively, socialize mindlessly, and engage in a host of activities out of a desire to simply avoid being still.”

— Shefali Tsabary

57. “To live in a state of being requires you to connect to your inner pulse. When you work from this centered, still place, all activity that arises is simply a manifestation of your deeper purpose. Coming from this place, you no longer engage in one pursuit after another, but instead devote your energy to awareness of your inner stillness. This inner stillness manifests as presence, and presence is the core characteristic of the awakened, receptive, accepting spirit of a conscious parent.”

— Shefali Tsabary

58. “The yo-yo is between our love and hate for our own missing parts. We are waiting for ourselves.”

— Shefali Tsabary

59. “Instead of taking our children’s behavior personally, it’s helpful to understand that our children aren’t thinking of us when they are acting out, only of themselves! To bring them to a state of calm, we need to find the strength to separate ourselves from their behavior. We need to detach our ego from how they are acting at the moment, then from a place of serenity work to halt their inappropriate behavior.”

— Shefali Tsabary

60. “It’s important to express gratitude to our children just for being who they are. Rarely do we thank them for who they are, yet we always want them to appreciate who we are.”

— Shefali Tsabary

61. “Let them go to school and not be anxious about the grade they get, realizing that when we are overly invested in grades or how well they do at a certain hobby, they begin to lose interest in the learning and focus only on the perfection of the outcome. Let them fly in their imagination.”

— Shefali Tsabary

62. “When we shift from egoic doing to authentic being, our worldview changes. We find ourselves no longer focusing on need, but on service; no longer feeling internal lack, but experiencing abundance; no longer feeling stuck, but flowing; no longer locked into the past, but present now.”

— Shefali Tsabary

63. “When we empty our life of clutter, noise, and distractions, prioritizing our schedule around the creation of space, we open the way for vital experiences.”

— Shefali Tsabary

64. “By learning to view conflict as a way to experience the value in “losing,” the beauty of creating a negotiated solution, and the foolhardiness of living in a rigid world of either-or, you teach your children to engage life as it truly is: full of complex, competing demands, and rich with unpredictability. You teach them that “winning” in life is all about finding creative solutions, being flexible, and learning to negotiate authentically with an intimate other.”

— Shefali Tsabary

65. “Our children won’t stay around us forever but will soon move on to their own lives. It’s during the few short years we have them to ourselves that we can help them awaken to the fullness within them, because it’s into this inner cup that they will dip when they are alone at college and under pressure, in a relationship and struggling with intimacy, or in a financial crunch and anxious. To prepare them for this, their spirit needs to be nourished on a daily basis.”

— Shefali Tsabary

66. “Doing something we love, connecting to our inner being in stillness and solitude, honoring our body by taking care of it on a daily basis through the food we eat, the exercise we engage in, and the way we are at peace with how we look are all ways of teaching our children to value themselves.”

— Shefali Tsabary

67. “When a woman tells the daring truth of what she has endured, she moves away from being mired in individual fear toward a new emotion – love. She declares, “I love myself. I am worthy of being heard. I am more than the sum of my past. I trust my voice.”

— Shefali Tsabary

68. “Many women stay ad nauseam in dysfunctional relationships because they keep waiting for the other person to change. Their happiness swings like a pendulum, forever dependent on the other.”

— Shefali Tsabary

69. “At the end of the day this has nothing to do with him. This is all about you – how you attracted him into your life and how you kept him engaged in a cycle of dysfunction. If you focus on him, you will lose. You need to focus on your inner void, since this is what keeps this dynamic alive.”

— Shefali Tsabary

70. “Of course, the root of this fear is our fear of death. This.”

— Shefali Tsabary

71. “When we teach our children early that they are to work toward something, schoolwork becomes tied to mastery of concepts. Activities are geared to becoming better at things, instead of something our children participate in for pleasure. In all of this, our focus is on where our children are going, instead of on where they are.”

— Shefali Tsabary

72. “Whether children are six or sixteen, they yearn to have a meaningful connection with their parents. If the relationship becomes about control, judgment, reprimands, lectures, and pressure, a child will turn a deaf ear. However, if the relationship is about autonomy, empowerment, kinship, emotional freedom, and authenticity, what child would reject their parents?”

— Shefali Tsabary

73. “We show them that learning to live with their limitations with ease is a far more important lesson than being attached to perfection.”

— Shefali Tsabary

74. “Somewhere deep in our unconscious we have a vision of how we are supposed to be and the roles we are to fulfill. When this version of ourselves doesn’t pan out, we go through a pivotal identity shock. We die to ourselves. We feel as if we are no one and that our life has no meaning. Who are we without the image we embraced of ourselves?”

— Shefali Tsabary

75. “Cherishing every moment of our children’s existence, we enjoy each experience, especially those that seem ordinary. We stop wasting time and energy on endeavors that ultimately evoke no joy. We cease squandering our existence on impersonal material things, realizing that what matters is a connection to ourselves and the relationships in our life.”

— Shefali Tsabary

76. “Imaginative by nature, children are able to respond to the as is with body, soul, and spirit.”

— Shefali Tsabary

77. “Every experience appears before us to teach us more about ourselves. When reality doesn’t go according to our expectations, instead of reacting, we tell ourselves, “Surrender, let go, detach, examine the expectation.” Our thoughts and emotions are a reflection of our inner state and require observation, not reaction.”

— Shefali Tsabary

78. “Through osmosis, they then begin to inherit a way of being that’s similar to our own. They soak in our presence and imitate our ability to relate to ourselves and our life. In this way, simply by embodying our essence in our daily interactions, we help our children find their way back to a sense of fullness, which enables them to identify the abundance in every situation.”

— Shefali Tsabary

79. “The truth is, many a modern child’s hectic schedule is more about the inability of parents to sit still than the child’s need to do so much.”

— Shefali Tsabary

80. “At every opportunity, encourage your children to listen to their inner voice, love the process of learning, enjoy the mastery of a skill, revel in taking a risk, and laugh at themselves when they fail.”

— Shefali Tsabary

81. “Our four-year-old can be taught, right here in the moment, that this isn’t a me-versus-you battle, but a situation we are in together for which we need to find a creative solution that works for us both.”

— Shefali Tsabary

82. “It’s no easy matter to accept that, ultimately, this journey of life is only ours to call our own. We fear we’ll feel isolated and lonely if we really claim our uniqueness. This is because, to the degree we are strangers to ourselves, we feel ill-equipped to nourish our own self. Little do we realize that it’s only through the experience of our unique path that we can experience both personal fulfillment and oneness with all beings.”

— Shefali Tsabary

83. “One of the most common forms of “doing” that we use to cover up our inability to just be is anxiety.”

— Shefali Tsabary

84. “How can I look within myself for solutions to my disempowerment.”

— Shefali Tsabary

85. “We are triggered not by their behavior, but by our own unresolved emotional issues.”

— Shefali Tsabary

86. “Set the bar for speaking from their authentic voice Set the bar for engaging in daily dialogue with you Set the bar for engaging in acts of service Set the bar for sitting in stillness on a daily basis Set the bar for manifesting imagination, creativity, and soul Set the bar for being kind to themselves and others Set the bar for delighting in learning Set the bar for expressing emotions in a direct manner Set the bar for demonstrating curiosity and a state of receptive openness.”

— Shefali Tsabary

87. “Children are as content with a little fruit for dinner as they are with a gourmet meal. Their eyes don’t search for things to attach to, but for things to let go of. Instead of imposing their will on life, they flow with the stream.”

— Shefali Tsabary

88. “How will she learn to navigate her way through her boredom if I rescue her all the time?” Our children develop emotional sturdiness when they manage their emotions without the assistance of an external aid.”

— Shefali Tsabary

89. “In fact, when we examine anxiety closely, it’s really a passive state – a distractor that allows us to fill our head with busy thoughts that appear to be active responses to our situation but in reality are powerless. Though we seek to impose control through the stance we take on an issue, by means of our thoughts, or by seeking to impose our will on others, we rarely take the action required to alter things.”

— Shefali Tsabary

90. “We engage in doing because we find it easier to say yes to those aspects of life connected to our child’s performance in society than to their authentic being. However, if we shift our own axis to a delight in simply being, so that all our activity flows from this childlike state, we spontaneously find ourselves honoring our children for those qualities that may be less quantifiable but that are infinitely more essential – qualities such as authenticity, awe, joy, peace, courage, and trust.”

— Shefali Tsabary