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Fred Allen Quotes
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Fred Allen Quote: “A comedian who starts talking to himself becomes his own audience. This is fatal.”
Fred Allen Quote: “Radio is a bag of mediocrity where little men with carbon minds wallow in sluice of their own making.”
Fred Allen Quote: “If children could vote, Jesse Jackson would be our next president.”
Fred Allen Quote: “He has no idea what it was like to grow up in the South, where you had to hold your head down.”
Fred Allen Quote: “The advertising world had space men in it before spacemen existed.”
Fred Allen Quote: “After quitting radio I was able to live on the money I saved on aspirins.”
Fred Allen Quote: “A psychiatrists is the next man you start talking to after you start talking to yourself.”
Fred Allen Quote: “Success is like dealing with your kid or teaching your wife to drive. Sooner or later you’ll end up in the police station.”
Fred Allen Quote: “In show business, more showgirls are kept than promises.”
Fred Allen Quote: “A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.”
Fred Allen Quote: “Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission.”
Fred Allen Quote: “Life, in my estimation, is a biological misadventure that we terminate on the shoulders of six strange men whose only objective is to make a hole in one with you.”
Fred Allen Quote: “Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.”
Fred Allen Quote: “I can’t understand why a person will take a year or two to write a novel when he can easily buy one for a few dollars.”
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