Top 300 Mindy Kaling Quotes (2024 Update)
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151. “What is fascinating to me is that divorced people tend to be the least depressing or depressed people I know. They’re all unburdened and cleansed, and the wiser for it. This is the case even if they didn’t initiate the divorce.”

— Mindy Kaling

152. “Until I realized: this long expanse of free time to rekindle friendships is not real. We will never come home to each other again and we will never again have each other’s undivided attention. That version of our friendship is over forever. And when I remember this, and it usually happens in those awful, quiet evening hours on Sunday nights, after dinner but before bed, I just lie on my sofa and cry for half an hour.”

— Mindy Kaling

153. “And as everyone knows, the best kind of laughter is laughter born of a shared memory.”

— Mindy Kaling

154. “Twitter is so short, it’s safe. I don’t want my bosses to be like, ‘Hey, your script is due and we saw you wrote four blog pages.’”

— Mindy Kaling

155. “I was just this chubby little Indian kid who looked like a nerd. I didn’t have a ton of academic skills. It wasn’t until I was in high school that I was like, “I guess I like writing dialogue.” So that’s how I got into it.”

— Mindy Kaling

156. “I would be the first to admit that I have incredibly high, ambitious standards for my life and my career, and I’ve had those my entire life. It’s something that was just instilled in me by my parents.”

— Mindy Kaling

157. “Once I saw Paris Hilton leaving a restaurant in Hollywood and the paparazzi cameras were all over her. It looked so unpleasant. It wasn’t because she didn’t look sensational – she was that perfect combination of fashionable and slutty – it was because the paparazzi guys were shouting these insanely rude and intrusive questions at her. Like, asking her who she was sleeping with and stuff. I was kind of interested in the answer, so I was glad they asked, but it was still gross.”

— Mindy Kaling

158. “No one ever wants to hear how stressed out anyone else is, because most of the time everyone is stressed out. Going on and on in detail about how stressed out I am isn’t conversation. It’ll never lead anywhere. No one is going to say, “Wow, Mindy, you really have it especially bad. I have heard some stories of stress, but this just takes the cake.”

— Mindy Kaling

159. “There is a certain type of greasy hair that you get only when you are writing with no breaks.”

— Mindy Kaling

160. “I think references, where they fit organically, are great. It’s great to do a show that’s real and relatable, and so much of what is real, is using real things and instances that are specific. Specificity is the best tool you can have, as a writer.”

— Mindy Kaling

161. “More than half the questions I am asked are about the politics of the way I look.”

— Mindy Kaling

162. “Once, while living in New York City in the early 2000s, I was asked to leave a sports bar because the Yankees were playing my hometown Red Sox on TV and I lost my cool at a guy who was loudly dissing them. I yelled, “Derek Jeter is baseball’s Hitler!”

— Mindy Kaling

163. “I had to learn a skill set. I think I had the materials to be a good comedy writer.”

— Mindy Kaling

164. “I have never regretted erring on the side of withholding information.”

— Mindy Kaling

165. “I really think guys only need two pairs of shoes. A nice pair of black shoes and a pair of Chuck Taylors.”

— Mindy Kaling

166. “I worship makeup. The basics are always: Stila shadows, LeClerc powder for my crazy shiny skin, Bobbie brown liner pot, Chanel mascara, and Koh Gen Do for foundation, Nars for colors and sparkles.”

— Mindy Kaling

167. “I think a lot of people compare female writers or female comedians to each other in a way that men are not. Male comedy writers are not scrutinized.”

— Mindy Kaling

168. “If I can give one bit of advice to any drama major, high school theater kid, or inmate who is reading this in a prison library with dreams of being cast in the prison play, it’s this: write your own part. It is the only way I’ve gotten anywhere. It is much harder work, but sometimes you have to take destiny into your own hands. It forces you to think about what your strengths really are, and once you find them, you can showcase them, and no one can stop you.”

— Mindy Kaling

169. “My theory is that this is because there’s a huge overlap between people who are good at Frisbee and people who do Teach for America. The same instinct to make at-risk kids learn, which I admire so much, becomes deadly when turned on friends trying to relax on a Sunday afternoon in the park.”

— Mindy Kaling

170. “I love romantic comedies. I feel almost sheepish writing that, because the genre has been so degraded in the past twenty years or so that admitting you like these movies is essentially an admission of mild stupidity. But that has not stopped me from watching them.”

— Mindy Kaling

171. “I have a goofy side that impacts my clothing a lot. To that end, I love witty, colorful, prints.”

— Mindy Kaling

172. “In my entire life, I never once heard either of my parents say they were stressed. That was just not a phrase I grew up being allowed to say. That, and the concept of “Me time.”

— Mindy Kaling

173. “If I gave my mother a knitted scarf she’d be worried I was wasting my time doing stupid stuff like knitting instead of school work. Presenting a homemade knitted object to my parents was actually like handing them a detailed backlog of my idleness.”

— Mindy Kaling

174. “My attitude toward alcohol was that it was a delicious and dangerous treat that, when obtained, needed to be ingested quickly in case someone tried to take it away. You know, the way a raccoon eats from a garbage can.”

— Mindy Kaling

175. “People don’t say “Give me your honest opinion” because they want an honest opinion. They say it because it’s rude to say “Please tell me I’m amazing.”

— Mindy Kaling

176. “It makes me cry because it means that fewer and fewer people are believing it’s cool to want what I want, which is to be married and have kids and love each other in a monogamous, long-lasting relationship.”

— Mindy Kaling

177. “I’m not married, I frequently use my debit card to buy things that cost less than three dollars, and my bedroom is so untidy it looks like vandals ransacked the Anthropologie sale section. I’m kind of a mess.”

— Mindy Kaling

178. “Why wear white? It’s like, forget about dropping something on it. I don’t understand how anybody wears white.”

— Mindy Kaling

179. “As my mom has said, when one person is unhappy, it usually means two people are unhappy but that one has not come to terms with it yet.”

— Mindy Kaling

180. “He was so popular you could barely look at him without being blinded by cool.”

— Mindy Kaling

181. “The result of my not caring so much about what I say allows me to care more about how I say it.”

— Mindy Kaling

182. “I knew the truth, which is if someone really wants to see you, they always find a way. Always. That.”

— Mindy Kaling

183. “What’s so wrong with effort, anyway? It means you care.”

— Mindy Kaling

184. “You always want to keep your look clean and elegant, but you don’t have to do the safe black-dress route. Have some fun! Wear something colorful with a hint of sparkle.”

— Mindy Kaling

185. “I will have a stern man in anything I ever write; I just love a gruff guy with a heart of gold. I guess what I’m saying is Walter Matthau is the man of my dreams.”

— Mindy Kaling

186. “Sometimes I eavesdrop on people. I could rationalize it – oh, this is good anthropological research for characters I’m writing – but it’s basically just nosiness. It also helps me gauge where I’m at: Am I normal?”

— Mindy Kaling

187. “I feel like I’m in the right profession.”

— Mindy Kaling

188. “We always think of a diet with a big groan. But I think diets are fun. I think it is an American pastime for a lot of women.”

— Mindy Kaling

189. “I am notorious for making impassioned speeches about things nobody cares about.”

— Mindy Kaling

190. “Just bear a passing resemblance to a fictional romantic trope I like and I will love you forever. We’re all just trying to find the Mark Darcy of our workplace, aren’t we?”

— Mindy Kaling

191. “If I sound bitter, that’s because I’m still a little bitter.”

— Mindy Kaling

192. “Nothing gives you confidence like being a member of a small, weirdly specific, hard-to-find demographic.”

— Mindy Kaling

193. “It’s traumatizing to think that a best friend could become just a friend. That’s because there is virtually no difference between an acquaintance and a friend. But the gulf between a friend and a best friend is enormous and profound.”

— Mindy Kaling

194. “Hell is Whole Foods on a Sunday. It’s hordes of moms in lightweight fleeces pushing one another out of the way to get to bins of dry lentils.”

— Mindy Kaling

195. “For lunch I usually have something hearty like a burger or tacos. I have always believed lunch should be the biggest meal of the day. People who say breakfast should be the biggest meal are insane. You can’t have dessert at breakfast.”

— Mindy Kaling

196. “I feel like the high-concept shows that have some kind of gimmick tend not to be the hit classic shows of all time.”

— Mindy Kaling

197. “Confidence is just entitlement. Entitlement has gotten a bad rap because it’s used almost exclusively for the useless children of the rich, reality TV stars, and Conrad Hilton Jr., who gets kicked off an airplane for smoking pot in the lavatory and calling people peasants or whatever. But entitlement in and of itself isn’t so bad. Entitlement is simply the belief that you deserve something. Which is great. The hard part is, you’d better make sure you deserve it.”

— Mindy Kaling

198. “We did not stage kiss because we didn’t know any better. It was just lights, camera, tongue-dance.”

— Mindy Kaling

199. “The idealism and adorability of Rob Lowe and Bradley Whitford had made me long for a civic-minded beau who is constantly making long, important speeches and taking principled stands.”

— Mindy Kaling

200. “So much of college is girls labeling other girls terrible things when they don’t like their behavior, but using concerned language so they have plausible deniability is they get accused of being bitches: That girl is not cheerfully doing what the rest of us are doing, so she is probably ‘depressed’ or ‘has an eating disorder’ or ‘is weird with guys,’ and so on.”

— Mindy Kaling