Top 500 Susan Cain Quotes (2025 Update)
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101. “One of the best things you can do for an introverted child is to work with him on his reaction to novelty. Remember that introverts react not only to new people, but also to new places and events. So don’t mistake your child’s caution in new situations for an inability to relate to others. He’s recoiling from novelty or overstimulation, not from human contact.”

— Susan Cain

102. “Hans Eysenck once observed, introversion “concentrates the mind on the tasks in hand, and prevents the dissipation of energy on social and sexual matters unrelated to work.” In other words, if you’re in the backyard sitting under a tree while everyone else is clinking glasses on the patio, you’re more likely to have an apple fall on your head.”

— Susan Cain

103. “I’m insatiably curious about human nature.”

— Susan Cain

104. “Some introverts are perfectly comfortable with public speaking; I’m not one of them.”

— Susan Cain

105. “Introverts, in contrast, may have strong social skills and enjoy parties and business meetings, but after a while wish they were home in their pajamas. They prefer to devote their social energies to close friends, colleagues, and family. They listen more than they talk, think before they speak, and often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation. They tend to dislike conflict. Many have a horror of small talk, but enjoy deep discussions.”

— Susan Cain

106. “I actually find extroversion to be a really appealing personality style.”

— Susan Cain

107. “Enjoyment appears at the boundary between boredom and anxiety, when the challenges are just balanced with the person’s capacity to act. – MIHALY CSIKSZENTMIHALYI.”

— Susan Cain

108. “If you’re an introvert, find your flow by using your gifts. You have the power of persistence, the tenacity to solve complex problems, and the clear-sightedness to avoid pitfalls that trip others up. You enjoy relative freedom from the temptations of superficial prizes like money and status. Indeed, your biggest challenge may be to fully harness your strengths.”

— Susan Cain

109. “Do you really believe in what you said or wrote – in the thing that’s bringing criticism? And if I do believe it, I can withstand anything.”

— Susan Cain

110. “It also helps explain why extroverts are more prone than introverts to overconfidence – defined as greater confidence unmatched by greater ability.”

— Susan Cain

111. “Every American was to become a performing self.”

— Susan Cain

112. “Love is essential; gregariousness is optional. Cherish your nearest and dearest. Work with colleagues you like and respect. Scan new acquaintances for those who might fall into the former categories or whose company you enjoy for its own sake. And don’t worry about socializing with everyone else. Relationships make everyone happier, introverts included, but think quality over quantity.”

— Susan Cain

113. “Those who live the most fully realized lives – giving back to their families, societies, and ultimately themselves – tend to find meaning in their obstacles.”

— Susan Cain

114. “In a gentle way, you can shake the world. – MAHATMA GANDHI.”

— Susan Cain

115. “I’m insatiably curious about human nature. I feel very lucky that as a writer I get to learn so much about it just to do my job right.”

— Susan Cain

116. “Anyone can be a great negotiator, I told them, and in fact it often pays to be quiet and gracious, to listen more than talk, and to have an instinct for harmony rather than conflict. With this style, you can take aggressive positions without inflaming your counterpart’s ego. And by listening, you can learn what’s truly motivating the person you’re negotiating with and come up with creative solutions that satisfy both parties.”

— Susan Cain

117. “We like to think that we value individuality, but all too often we admire one type of individual – the.”

— Susan Cain

118. “Introverts tend to be driven by their interests and passions, naturally organizing their lives around the things they love most to do. This is a great boon, because focusing on one or two pursuits tends to build mastery in a given area, and mastery builds self-confidence – rather than the other way around.”

— Susan Cain

119. “Keep in mind the words of Sir Winston Churchill: ‘Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.”

— Susan Cain

120. “Talkative people, for example, are rated as smarter, better-looking, more interesting, and more desirable as friends.”

— Susan Cain

121. “Shyness is inherently uncomfortable; introversion is not. The traits do overlap, though psychologists debate to what degree.”

— Susan Cain

122. “Though shyness per se was unacceptable, reserve was a mark of good breeding.”

— Susan Cain

123. “The introverted leaders were 20 percent more likely to follow the suggestion – and their teams had 24 percent better results than the teams of the extroverted leaders.”

— Susan Cain

124. “College students who tend to study alone learn more over time than those who work in groups. Even elite athletes in team sports often spend unusual amounts of time in solitary practice.”

— Susan Cain

125. “I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was four years old!”

— Susan Cain

126. “A widely held, but rarely articulated, belief in our society is that the ideal self is bold, alpha, gregarious. Introversion is viewed somewhere between disappointment and pathology.”

— Susan Cain

127. “High-reactive kids also tend to think and feel deeply about what they’ve noticed, and to bring an extra degree of nuance to everyday experiences.”

— Susan Cain

128. “If you’re that rare engineer who’s an inventor and also an artist, I’m going to give you some advice that might be hard to take. That advice is: Work alone. You’re going to be best able to design revolutionary products and features if you’re working on your own. Not on a committee. Not on a team.”

— Susan Cain

129. “If your child prefers to work autonomously and socialize one-on-one, there’s nothing wrong with her; she just happens not to fit the prevailing model. The purpose of school should be to prepare kids for the rest of their lives, but too often what kids need to be prepared for is surviving the school day itself.”

— Susan Cain

130. “The key is to expose your child gradually to new situations and people – taking care to respect his limits, even when they seem extreme. This produces more-confident kids than either overprotection or pushing too hard.”

— Susan Cain

131. “Use your natural powers – of persistence, concentration, and insight – to do work you love and work that matters. Solve problems, make art, and think deeply.”

— Susan Cain

132. “Most inventors and engineers I’ve met are like me – they’re shy and they live in their heads. They’re almost like artists. In fact, the very best of them are artists. And artists work best alone where they can control an invention’s design without a lot of other people designing it for marketing or some other committee. I don’t believe anything really revolutionary has been invented by committee.”

— Susan Cain

133. “Love is essential; gregariousness is optional. Cherish your nearest and dearest. Work with colleagues you like and respect.”

— Susan Cain

134. “We are like rubber bands at rest. We are elastic and can stretch ourselves, but only so much.”

— Susan Cain

135. “Aron has noted that sensitive people tend to speak softly because that’s how they prefer others to communicate with them.”

— Susan Cain

136. “Some animals carry their shelter wherever they go. Some humans are just the same.”

— Susan Cain

137. “I don’t really like being the guest at someone else’s party, because then I have to be entertaining. But I’ll host parties because it puts you at the center of things without actually being a social person.”

— Susan Cain

138. “If you have talented and motivated people, they should be encouraged to work alone when creativity or efficiency is the highest priority.”

— Susan Cain

139. “You may be so busy trying to appear like a zestful, reward-sensitive extrovert that you undervalue your own talents, or feel underestimated by those around you. But when you’re focused on a project that you care about, you probably find that your energy is boundless.”

— Susan Cain

140. “Many Asian cultures are team-oriented, but not in the way that Westerners think of teams. Individuals in Asia see themselves as part of a greater whole – whether family, corporation, or community – and place tremendous value on harmony within their group. They often subordinate their own desires to the group’s interests, accepting their place in its hierarchy.”

— Susan Cain

141. “Some of the world’s most talented people are introverts.”

— Susan Cain

142. “Persistence isn’t very glamorous. If genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration, then as a culture we tend to lionize the one percent. We love its flash and dazzle. But great power lies in the other ninety-nine percent. “It’s not that I’m so smart,” said Einstein, who was a consummate introvert. “It’s that I stay with problems longer.”

— Susan Cain

143. “Don’t let anyone tell you that introverts are anti-social – we are just differently social.”

— Susan Cain

144. “Professor Richard Howard gave introverts and extroverts a complicated series of printed mazes, and found not only that the introverts tended to solve more mazes correctly, but also that they spent a much greater percentage of their allotted time inspecting the maze before entering it.”

— Susan Cain

145. “It’s also vital to recognize that many people – especially introverts like Steve Wozniak – need extra quiet and privacy in order to do their best work.”

— Susan Cain

146. “Whatever pain you can’t get rid of, make it your creative offering.”

— Susan Cain

147. “One new honest-to-goodness relationship is worth ten fistfuls of business cards.”

— Susan Cain

148. “Work alone. You’re going to be best able to design revolutionary products and features if you’re working on your own. Not on a committee. Not on a team.”

— Susan Cain

149. “I learned to not worry so much about the outcome, but to concentrate on the step I was on and to try to do it as perfectly as I could when I was doing it.”

— Susan Cain

150. “High-reactive kids who enjoy good parenting, child care, and a stable home environment tend to have fewer emotional problems and more social skills than their lower-reactive peers, studies show.”

— Susan Cain