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Frank Zappa Quotes
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Frank Zappa Quote: “Nobody looks good with brown lipstick on.”

Nobody looks good with brown lipstick on.

— Frank Zappa



Frank Zappa Quote: “I want a horny little Jewish princess.”

I want a horny little Jewish princess.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Most people don’t bother about their friends in the vegetable kingdom.”

Most people don’t bother about their friends in the vegetable kingdom.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Their stupidity does not amaze me, its when they’re smart that amazes me. It’s baffling whenever you find someone who’s smart – incredible. Soon you’ll have zoos for such things.”

Their stupidity does not amaze me, its when they’re smart that amazes me. It’s baffling whenever you find someone who’s smart – incredible. Soon you’ll have zoos for such things.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “If you pick up a guitar and it says, ‘take me, I’m yours,’ then that’s the one for you.”

If you pick up a guitar and it says, ‘take me, I’m yours,’ then that’s the one for you.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “The kerosene record player is not a very efficient device.”

The kerosene record player is not a very efficient device.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Republican is fine, if your a millionaire. Democrats is fair, if all you own is what you wear. Neither of them’s really right, cause neither of them care.”

Republican is fine, if your a millionaire. Democrats is fair, if all you own is what you wear. Neither of them’s really right, cause neither of them care.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Anybody who wants religion is welcome to it, as far as I’m concerned – I support your right to enjoy it. However, I would appreciate it if you exhibited more respect for the rights of those people who do not wish to share your dogma, rapture, or necrodestination.”

Anybody who wants religion is welcome to it, as far as I’m concerned – I support your right to enjoy it. However, I would appreciate it if you exhibited more respect for the rights of those people who do not wish to share your dogma, rapture, or necrodestination.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “In order to deviate successfully, one has to have at least a passing acquaintance with whatever norm one expects to deviate from.”

In order to deviate successfully, one has to have at least a passing acquaintance with whatever norm one expects to deviate from.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.”

Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe.

— Frank Zappa



Frank Zappa Quote: “I would say that today, dishonesty is the rule, and honesty the exception. It could be, statistically, that more people are honest than dishonest, but the few that really control things are not honest, and that tips the balance.”

I would say that today, dishonesty is the rule, and honesty the exception. It could be, statistically, that more people are honest than dishonest, but the few that really control things are not honest, and that tips the balance.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “The price of meat has just gone up and your old lady has just gone down.”

The price of meat has just gone up and your old lady has just gone down.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Give me the enchilada with the pickle sauce shoved up between the donkey’s ass.”

Give me the enchilada with the pickle sauce shoved up between the donkey’s ass.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “I am the slime oozing out from your TV set. You will obey me while I lead you, and eat the garbage while I feed you.”

I am the slime oozing out from your TV set. You will obey me while I lead you, and eat the garbage while I feed you.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Mama stroked his dinger, Daddy got stinky finger.”

Mama stroked his dinger, Daddy got stinky finger.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Catholic girls with tiny little mustaches.”

Catholic girls with tiny little mustaches.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “He took a dog-doo snow cone and stuffed it in my right eye. He took a dog-doo snow cone and stuffed it in my other eye.”

He took a dog-doo snow cone and stuffed it in my right eye. He took a dog-doo snow cone and stuffed it in my other eye.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “You can’t always write a chord ugly enough to say what you want to say, so sometimes you have to rely on a giraffe filled with whipped cream.”

You can’t always write a chord ugly enough to say what you want to say, so sometimes you have to rely on a giraffe filled with whipped cream.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “You’ve got to be digging it while it’s happening ’cause it just might be a one shot deal.”

You’ve got to be digging it while it’s happening ’cause it just might be a one shot deal.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “When God created Republicans, he gave up on everything else.”

When God created Republicans, he gave up on everything else.

— Frank Zappa



Frank Zappa Quote: “All that we got here is American made. It’s a little bit cheesy, but it’s nicely displayed.”

All that we got here is American made. It’s a little bit cheesy, but it’s nicely displayed.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Children are naive-they trust everyone. School is bad enough, but, if you put a child anywhere in the vicinity of a church, you’re asking for trouble.”

Children are naive-they trust everyone. School is bad enough, but, if you put a child anywhere in the vicinity of a church, you’re asking for trouble.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “There’s a big difference between kneeling down and bending over.”

There’s a big difference between kneeling down and bending over.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “As far as rearing children goes, the basic idea I try to keep in mind is that a child is a person. Just because they happen to be a little shorter than you doesn’t mean they are dumber than you.”

As far as rearing children goes, the basic idea I try to keep in mind is that a child is a person. Just because they happen to be a little shorter than you doesn’t mean they are dumber than you.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “I want a hairy little Jewish Princess with a brand new nose, who knows where it goes.”

I want a hairy little Jewish Princess with a brand new nose, who knows where it goes.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “The rock and roll business is pretty absurd, but the world of serious music is much worse.”

The rock and roll business is pretty absurd, but the world of serious music is much worse.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “She lives in Mojave in a Winnebago. His name is Bobby, he looks like a potato.”

She lives in Mojave in a Winnebago. His name is Bobby, he looks like a potato.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “It is always advisable to be a loser if you cannot become a winner.”

It is always advisable to be a loser if you cannot become a winner.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Two things are universal: Hydrogen and stupidity.”

Two things are universal: Hydrogen and stupidity.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “I proceeded to take that mitten full of the deadly yellow snow crystals and rub it all into his beady little eyes with a vigorous circular motion.”

I proceeded to take that mitten full of the deadly yellow snow crystals and rub it all into his beady little eyes with a vigorous circular motion.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “The whole foundation of Christianity is based on the idea that intellectualism is the work of the Devil. Remember the apple on the tree? Okay, it was the Tree of Knowledge. You eat this apple, you’re going to be as smart as God. We can’t have that.”

The whole foundation of Christianity is based on the idea that intellectualism is the work of the Devil. Remember the apple on the tree? Okay, it was the Tree of Knowledge. You eat this apple, you’re going to be as smart as God. We can’t have that.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Wowie zowie, love me do. Wowie zowie, and I’ll love you, too.”

Wowie zowie, love me do. Wowie zowie, and I’ll love you, too.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Well Mike, I’m abnormal.”

Well Mike, I’m abnormal.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Let’s not be too rough on our own ignorance, it’s what makes America great.”

Let’s not be too rough on our own ignorance, it’s what makes America great.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “You can’t escape the puking sphinx.”

You can’t escape the puking sphinx.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “I think pop music has done more for oral intercourse than anything else that has ever happened, and vice versa.”

I think pop music has done more for oral intercourse than anything else that has ever happened, and vice versa.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Sit and spin ’til you rot on the cosmic utensil.”

Sit and spin ’til you rot on the cosmic utensil.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Science is moving closer to weaponry, and Art is moving closer to commercialism. And never the twain shall meet.”

Science is moving closer to weaponry, and Art is moving closer to commercialism. And never the twain shall meet.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Roller-skates and disco are a lot of fun, I’m much too young and stupid to operate a gun.”

Roller-skates and disco are a lot of fun, I’m much too young and stupid to operate a gun.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.”

Politics is the entertainment branch of industry.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they’ll murder you in your sleep.”

If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they’ll murder you in your sleep.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Beauty is a pair of shoes that makes you wanna die.”

Beauty is a pair of shoes that makes you wanna die.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Modern music is people who can’t think signing artists who can’t write songs to make records for people who can’t hear.”

Modern music is people who can’t think signing artists who can’t write songs to make records for people who can’t hear.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Music is always a commentary on society.”

Music is always a commentary on society.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Brown shoes don’t make it.”

Brown shoes don’t make it.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Outdoors for me is walking from the car to the ticket desk at the airport.”

Outdoors for me is walking from the car to the ticket desk at the airport.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “I’m not going to be Bill Clinton and say I never inhaled. I did inhale. I liked tobacco a lot better.”

I’m not going to be Bill Clinton and say I never inhaled. I did inhale. I liked tobacco a lot better.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “Her head is full of bubbles, her nose is petite, she looks like she never gets nothing to eat.”

Her head is full of bubbles, her nose is petite, she looks like she never gets nothing to eat.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “The language and concepts contained herein are guaranteed not to cause eternal torment in the place where the guy with the horns and pointed stick conducts his business.”

The language and concepts contained herein are guaranteed not to cause eternal torment in the place where the guy with the horns and pointed stick conducts his business.

— Frank Zappa


Frank Zappa Quote: “He wants to do you in cause the color of your skin.”

He wants to do you in cause the color of your skin.

— Frank Zappa

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