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Frank Zappa Quotes

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Frank Zappa Quote: “Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “So many books, so little time.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Music is the only religion that delivers the goods.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is not truth. Truth is not beauty. Beauty is not love. Love is not music. Music is THE BEST.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Art is making something out of nothing, and selling it.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons and 85% morons.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “It’s better to have something to remember than anything to regret.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Government is the Entertainment division of the military-industrial complex.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Don’t forget to vote.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “One size does not fit all.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Don’t eat the yellow snow.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “There are more love songs than anything else. If songs could make you do something we’d all love one another.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Reality is what it is, not what you want it to be.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline – it helps if you have some kind of football team, or some nuclear weapons, but in the very least you need a beer.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Jazz isn’t dead. It just smells funny.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I don’t want to spend my life explaining myself. You either get it, or you don’t.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Shut Up and Play your Guitar.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “All the good music has already been written by people with wigs and stuff.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Love of my life, I love you so. Love of my life, don’t ever go.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The most important thing to do in your life is to not interfere with somebody else’s life.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Stupidity has a certain charm – ignorance does not.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Drop out of school before your mind rots from exposure to our mediocre educational system. Forget about the Senior Prom and go to the library and educate yourself if you’ve got any guts. Some of you like Pep rallies and plastic robots who tell you what to read.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Music is the most physically inspiring of all the arts.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “To me absurdity is the only reality.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Moving to Montana soon, gonna be a dental floss tycoon.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Ram it up your poop chute.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The most abundant element in the Universe is stupidity.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I enjoy irritating the people who enjoy being irritated.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “A wise man once said, never discuss philosophy or politics in a disco environment.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “It gets harder the more you know. Because the more you find out the uglier everything seems.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The crux of the biscuit is: If it entertains you, fine. Enjoy it. If it doesn’t, then blow it out your ass. I do it to amuse myself. If I like it, I release it. If somebody else likes it, that’s a bonus.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The only difference between a cult and a religion is the amount of real estate they own.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I can take about an hour on the tower of power, as long as I gets a little golden shower.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Why do you necessarily have to be wrong just because a few million people think you are?”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and randomly enforced.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The disgusting stink of a too-loud electric guitar; now that’s my idea of a good time.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The whole Universe is a large joke. Everything in the Universe are just subdivisions of this joke. So why take anything too serious.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “There is no hell. There is only France.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Tobacco is my favorite vegetable.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “If classical music is the state of the art, then the arts are in a sad state.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I’m not black, but there’s a whole lot of times I wish I could say I’m not white.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “This is a stupid song and that’s the way I like it.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Don’t mind your make-up, you’d better make your mind up.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “There will never be a nuclear war; there’s too much real estate involved.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Call any vegetable and the chances are good that the vegetable will respond to you.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “One of my favorite philosophical tenets is that people will agree with you only if they already agree with you. You do not change people’s minds.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I’m probably more famous for sitting on the toilet than for anything else that I do.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Drugs will turn you into your parents.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I think that if you use the so-called “strong words” you’ll get your point across faster and you can save a lot of beating around the bush. Why are people afraid of words? Sometimes the dumbest thing that gets said makes the point for you.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Rock music was never written for or performed for conservative tastes.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Just because somebody hears something you say, or reads something that you write, doesn’t mean you’ve reached them.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The crux of the biscuit is the apostrophe!”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Mr. Gorbachev has apparently stumbled onto one of the best-kept secrets in recent Soviet history: Communism doesn’t work.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The most important thing in art is The Frame. For painting: literally; for other arts: figuratively – because without this humble appliance, you can’t know where The Art stops and The Real World begins.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Anything played wrong twice in a row is the beginning of an arrangement.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The more boring a child is, the more the parents, when showing off the child, receive adulation for being good parents – because they have a tame child-creature in their house.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Maybe you should stay with your mama, you’re kind of stupid and ugly, too.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I write what I like to write. Those who like to listen to it, listen to it. And the ones who don’t, watch football and drink beer, jog, go to discos and so forth. I never claimed to be a man for all seasons.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The first thing you have to do if you want to raise nice kids, is you have to talk to them like they are people instead of talking to them like they’re property.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The computer can’t tell you the emotional story. It can give you the exact mathematical design, but what’s missing is the eyebrows.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Beware of the fish people, they are the true enemy.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Information doesn’t kill you.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I think that if a person doesn’t feel cynical then they’re out of phase with the 20th century. Being cynical is the only way to deal with modern civilization – you can’t just swallow it whole.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The last election just laid the foundation of the next 500 years of Dark Ages.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Whatever you have to do to have a good time, let’s get on with it, so long as it doesn’t cause a murder.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “You are what you is, you is what you am, you ain’t what you’re not. So see what you got?”

Frank Zappa Quote: “My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I ain’t the type for begging, I am not the type to plead. If she don’t change those evil ways, I’m gonna make her bleed.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Take the Kama Sutra. How many people died from the Kama Sutra as opposed to the Bible? Who wins?”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Communism doesn’t work because people like to own stuff.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Anyone who is disturbed by the idea of newts in a nightclub is potentially dangerous.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Bad facts make bad law, and people who write bad laws are in my opinion more dangerous than songwriters who celebrate sexuality.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Listen honey, would I lie to you to get in your pants?”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I think you should leave it up to the parent, because not all parents want to keep their children totally ignorant.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Fact of the matter is, there is no hip world, there is no straight world. There’s a world, you see which has people in it who believe a variety of different things.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The plumber he says, never flush a tampon. This is great information, cost me half a weeks pay.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I’m the devil’s advocate. We have our own worshipers.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “My balls feel like a pair of maracas.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “She is an office girl, her name is Betty. Her favorite group is Helen Reddy.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Do your job and do it right, life’s a ball, TV tonight.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “The essence of Christianity is told us in the Garden of Eden history. The fruit that was forbidden was on the tree of knowledge. The subtext is, All the suffering you have is because you wanted to find out what was going on.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “It isn’t necessary to imagine the world ending in fire or ice. There are two other possibilities: one is paperwork, and the other is nostalgia.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Cocaine decisions that you make today, will mean nothing later on when you get nose decay.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Definition of rock journalism: People who can’t write, doing interviews with people who can’t think, in order to prepare articles for people who can’t read.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Republicans stand for raw, unbridled evil and greed and ignorance smothered in balloons and ribbons.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I’m more interested in melodic things. I think the biggest challenge when you go to play a solo is trying to invent a melody on the spot.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Producing satire is kind of hopeless because of the literacy rate of the American public.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “My school spirit is at an all time low, I’m losing my status at the school.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Scientists believe that the universe is made of hydrogen because they claim it’s the most plentiful ingredient. I claim that the most plentiful ingredient is stupidity.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Did you ever consider that LSD was really one of the most dangerous drugs ever manufactured because the people who took it turned into yuppies?”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Our big prize tonight is fifty American dollars to the girl with the most exciting mammalian protuberances.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “I want a steamy little Jewish Princess with over-worked gums, who squeaks when she cums. I don’t want no troll, I just want a Yemenite hole.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “My guitar wants to kill your mama.”

Frank Zappa Quote: “Nobody looks good with brown lipstick on.”

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