Top 500 James Patterson Quotes (2024 Update)
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351. “If we had directions, it wouldn’t be life. It would be an assignment. Grunt work.”

— James Patterson

352. “In movies, people always “borrow” cars by yanking some wires out from under the dash and connecting them. But the real way it works involves a screwdriver and the starter thingy, under the hood. My personal ethics prevent me from giving you more information. That’d be just what I need: a rash of car thefts across America, committed by dedicated readers.”

— James Patterson

353. “There was freedom in the pain. It meant he was still alive, still feeling, and he felt invincible. Whatever they did to him, however hard they fought, in the end, he would win.”

— James Patterson

354. “Was this normalcy-predictable patterns, the certainty of doing the same thing everyday? Because if so, normalcy was about to make me freak out and start screaming.”

— James Patterson

355. “Remember that country singer on American Songster, the girl whose father only let her order ketchup, mustard, and relish at McDonald’s because ketchup, mustard, and relish are free and you can mix them in a cup of hot water to make McSoup?”

— James Patterson

356. “Just in case you thought elephants were all sweetness, I can attest to the fact that this one had the time of her life scaring the bejeezus out of those dudes.”

— James Patterson

357. “Please, I begged silently, please do not let my last moments on earth be me crammed into a tiny boat in the dark, surrounded by mechanical singing pirates.”

— James Patterson

358. “I’m in shape... Round’s a shape.”

— James Patterson

359. “Part 5 The Voice- Make that my voice.”

— James Patterson

360. “One good thing is that I’ve been following the priest’s orders to meditate on how I’ve hurt people. It’s helped me recognize that we can’t help but make mistakes, even when our intentions are good.”

— James Patterson

361. “Some poeple just don’t have what it takes to appreciate a cookie.”

— James Patterson

362. “He’s wearing a dog tag. His name is Henry Webb. His unit is called BLM.” “What does it mean?” “Black Like Me. A solidarity movement, I suppose.”

— James Patterson

363. “Robinson sat up and peered out at the lawn. “I had no idea you were so deprived. They’re the best bugs in the world because they can light up their butts. It’s how they find mates.”

— James Patterson

364. “Seize what’s been handed you. Make smart decisions. Make decisions because life is a temporary situation.”

— James Patterson

365. “Iggy’s spine tightened, his face like ice. When he’d been at the School, they’d tried to surgically enhance his night vision. Now he was blind forever. Oops.”

— James Patterson

366. “If Fang is in any way harmed while I’m gone-if he gets a hangnail-you won’t see another morning. Are we clear on that?”

— James Patterson

367. “The more you read, the better you get at it.”

— James Patterson

368. “Let’s show Dr. God what hell feels like.”

— James Patterson

369. “Have faith and pursue the unknown end.” Oliver Wendell Holmes.”

— James Patterson

370. “I gave him a kick and he stepped back onto the third rail. Exploding, flaming eraser! This is why moms tell you to stay away from the third rail, but it sure came in handy this time.”

— James Patterson

371. “There’s always be a me and you.”

— James Patterson

372. “Unfortunately, every time someone said “debriefing,” the entire flock had one image: someone’s tighty-whities disappearing in a flash. We were smothering our giggles, but it was getting harder. Coupled with the whole “naval this, and naval that,” with its undeniable belly-button connotations, we were essentially turning into a sugar-jacked, sleep-deprived flock of incoherent, silly, recombinant-DNA goofballs. This was not going to end well.”

— James Patterson

373. “What are hands made for but this? For holding. for holding on.”

— James Patterson

374. “I’d have everything money could buy, but it wouldn’t be the same as having everything i wanted. Not even close.”

— James Patterson

375. “The bestselling author of all time, James Patterson.”

— James Patterson

376. “If you’re ever feeling a lack of middle-aged white men, just pop into the Capitol. Not so much the House of Representatives, which has a bit more color and texture, but the Senate – jeez. Yes, let’s have more testosterone running the country. Maximum Ride, School’s Out – Forever.”

— James Patterson

377. “Fang felt a cold jolt, then dismissed it. Max wasn’t dead. He would know, somehow. He would have felt it. The world still felt the same to him; therefore, Max was still in it.”

— James Patterson

378. “Oz thinks I’m beautiful,” she whispered to the stars.”

— James Patterson

379. “She’s about as sweet as a flaming turd.”

— James Patterson

380. “Advice: Don’t wait until someone you have issues with – especially someone you’re related to – gets shot before you work it out.”

— James Patterson

381. “I don’t think of myself as a writer.”

— James Patterson

382. “It’s always, always, always about the flock. I don’t know how to do it any other way.”

— James Patterson

383. “Total?” I said when he was close. “Can you talk?” He flopped down on the grass, panting slightly. “Yeah. So?” Jeezum. I mean, mutant weirdos are nothing new to me, you know? But a talking dog? “Why didn’t you mention this before?” I asked him. “It’s not like I lied about it,” said Total, reaching up with a hind leg to scratch behind one ear. “Between you and me, I’m still trying to get used to the whole flying-kid thing.”

— James Patterson

384. “A saying of Sun-tzu’s hammered through her head: “A victorious army wins its victories before seeking battle.”

— James Patterson

385. “By taking control of my sexuality, I felt like I’d finally taken control of my life.”

— James Patterson

386. “Please, sit down,” Sharon said with another hair toss. I made a mental note to practice doing that in a mirror the next time I saw one. it seemed a useful skill, right up there with roundhouse kicks.”

— James Patterson

387. “Keep your small mind open,” said Nana, wagging a crooked pinkie finger at Jannie. “That’s if you ever want it to grow bigger and don’t want to remain a small person all your life.”

— James Patterson

388. “Can we ever really judge behavior by the behavior itself? Lesson learned. Most often, we can’t.”

— James Patterson

389. “I dumped half a cup of green tea into the sink. To hell with my chakras. I needed coffee.”

— James Patterson

390. “Yes, I sounded like a pathetic weenie. I prefer to think of it as showing my softer side.”

— James Patterson

391. “You love me this much!” Fang spreads his arms wide.”

— James Patterson

392. “Our luck would not run out. That’s what i told myself. But they were only words.”

— James Patterson

393. “E is definitely the biggest ERROR my mother has ever made – worse than the time she designed a litter-box-cleaning robot that flung clumps of kitty poop all over the house.”

— James Patterson

394. “I’m Dr. Ethan Kane, director of the Hauer Institute. My senior medical staff joins me in welcoming all of you to Maryland and to Liberty General Hospital. Think of it! You’ve been chosen to make an extraordinary journey with us. You’ll be making medical history, making some very good money as well, and this will be the best experience you’ve ever had. I guarantee it!”

— James Patterson

395. “If I could run the world, I’d find another way to treat most of these criminals – most of them, not all of them – but we find widespread solutions to widespread problems in this country, so we just build big prisons and stick everyone inside them and, for the most part, forget about them once they’re gone. Noah.”

— James Patterson

396. “Give a guy with an inferiority complex some power and watch out.” I.”

— James Patterson

397. “Disney World. You’ve probably been. I’m assuming that most of America has been there, because you all seemed to be there the day that we went. All of you at the same time.”

— James Patterson

398. “The taxi was a V-6. Good, I’d probably need all of that. I clicked off the radio and AC to funnel extra power.”

— James Patterson

399. “I picked a star and wished as hard as i could that somehow i could protect him from what was on the horizon.”

— James Patterson

400. “Wasn’t this great?” Nudge asked excitedly. “I can’t believe we’re in the White House! I want to be president someday.” “I’ll be vice president,” the Gasman offered. “You guys would be great,” I said politely. Yes, they could run on the Mutant Party ticket, with a freak-of-nature platform. No prob. I’m sure America is ready for that.”

— James Patterson