Top 500 James Patterson Quotes (2026 Update)
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351. “Memory is all I have now.”

— James Patterson

352. “Michelangelo didn’t show David triumphant, the way every other sculptor did. He showed David before he fought Goliath – when David believed he was doomed and went into battle anyway.”

— James Patterson

353. “A lot healthier than getting socked in the stomach. Especially if you had a big breakfast.”

— James Patterson

354. “If you know the why, you can figure out the who.”

— James Patterson

355. “It means the third rail has seven hundred volts of direct current running through it. Touch it and you’re human popcorn.”

— James Patterson

356. “People always come up to me and say, ‘you should do standup.’ It’s nice to discover things about yourself. That keeps everything lively and fun.”

— James Patterson

Featured in: Fun Quotes

357. “She’s about as sweet as a flaming turd.”

— James Patterson

358. “Here’s something that might not occur to you: If a state trooper sees a weird, patchwork Toyota Echo hurtling down 1-95, and it looks like half of a small country is immigrating to the States in this one little car, you might get stopped.”

— James Patterson

359. “Every once in a while, I’ll have a ‘Do you know who I am?’ moment, at least in my head. I hate that.”

— James Patterson

360. “Sometimes I’m dramatic even to myself.”

— James Patterson

361. “It was a pretty complete list. The kind of list one makes when one cannot fall asleep because one’s thoughts keep swirling through one’s brain like a bunch of sparrows on crack.”

— James Patterson

362. “What is a lie? It’s a distortion of reality, presented as reality. We say it’s a bad thing. We teach kids not to lie. We even put people in prison for lying. And yet there are lies all around us, and half the time we don’t even really try to disguise it.”

— James Patterson

363. “Remember that country singer on American Songster, the girl whose father only let her order ketchup, mustard, and relish at McDonald’s because ketchup, mustard, and relish are free and you can mix them in a cup of hot water to make McSoup?”

— James Patterson

364. “The bestselling author of all time, James Patterson.”

— James Patterson

365. “Unfortunately, every time someone said “debriefing,” the entire flock had one image: someone’s tighty-whities disappearing in a flash. We were smothering our giggles, but it was getting harder. Coupled with the whole “naval this, and naval that,” with its undeniable belly-button connotations, we were essentially turning into a sugar-jacked, sleep-deprived flock of incoherent, silly, recombinant-DNA goofballs. This was not going to end well.”

— James Patterson

366. “Why is this happening? Who knows, really? Life and existence can never be fully understood. Stars are born only to explode. Creatures hunt other creatures, and then they die. The universe is a chaos of irrational forces wrestling with one another in a war without end. The human race is on the receiving end now.”

— James Patterson

367. “Have faith and pursue the unknown end.” Oliver Wendell Holmes.”

— James Patterson

368. “If you’re ever feeling a lack of middle-aged white men, just pop into the Capitol. Not so much the House of Representatives, which has a bit more color and texture, but the Senate – jeez. Yes, let’s have more testosterone running the country. Maximum Ride, School’s Out – Forever.”

— James Patterson

369. “It was all I could do to not give a mwa ha ha ha!”

— James Patterson

370. “Rafe was trying to convince an older couple that they needed an extra toilet.”

— James Patterson

371. “Give a guy with an inferiority complex some power and watch out.” I.”

— James Patterson

372. “All genders?” whispered Nudge. “Aren’t there just the two? Or did I miss something?” I shrugged. “No idea. Maybe they’ve created others.” The thought was fairly repulsive, and we made “eew” faces at each other.”

— James Patterson

373. “There was freedom in the pain. It meant he was still alive, still feeling, and he felt invincible. Whatever they did to him, however hard they fought, in the end, he would win.”

— James Patterson

374. “Just in case you thought elephants were all sweetness, I can attest to the fact that this one had the time of her life scaring the bejeezus out of those dudes.”

— James Patterson

375. “I’m in shape... Round’s a shape.”

— James Patterson

376. “I moved to leave, and Dylan actually grabbed me by my shoulders. I was so surprised that I forgot to karate-chop his elbows and break his arms.”

— James Patterson

377. “It doesn’t matter what the end looks like- what matters is that it came. Bam, you’re done. But life? There are degrees of life. You can live it well or half-asleep. You can go sledding down a sand dune, or you can spend your life in front of the TV. And i don’t mean to sound like a stupid after-school special, but you have to keep living the way we did these last weeks. Risk. That’s the secret. Risk everything.”

— James Patterson

378. “Itsumademo ai shiteru, Yuki. I love you forever, my daughter.”

— James Patterson

379. “Fang felt a cold jolt, then dismissed it. Max wasn’t dead. He would know, somehow. He would have felt it. The world still felt the same to him; therefore, Max was still in it.”

— James Patterson

380. “You love me this much!” Fang spreads his arms wide.”

— James Patterson

381. “There’s always be a me and you.”

— James Patterson

Featured in: Romance Quotes

382. “What are hands made for but this? For holding. for holding on.”

— James Patterson

383. “Some poeple just don’t have what it takes to appreciate a cookie.”

— James Patterson

384. “He’s wearing a dog tag. His name is Henry Webb. His unit is called BLM.” “What does it mean?” “Black Like Me. A solidarity movement, I suppose.”

— James Patterson

385. “Robinson sat up and peered out at the lawn. “I had no idea you were so deprived. They’re the best bugs in the world because they can light up their butts. It’s how they find mates.”

— James Patterson

386. “Please, sit down,” Sharon said with another hair toss. I made a mental note to practice doing that in a mirror the next time I saw one. it seemed a useful skill, right up there with roundhouse kicks.”

— James Patterson

387. “The trick to having obedient, unquestioning children was to have death be the other option.”

— James Patterson

388. “I don’t think of myself as a writer.”

— James Patterson

389. “Lawyer’s credo: Anyone can sue anyone for anything.”

— James Patterson

390. “Iggy’s spine tightened, his face like ice. When he’d been at the School, they’d tried to surgically enhance his night vision. Now he was blind forever. Oops.”

— James Patterson

391. “A saying of Sun-tzu’s hammered through her head: “A victorious army wins its victories before seeking battle.”

— James Patterson

392. “By taking control of my sexuality, I felt like I’d finally taken control of my life.”

— James Patterson

393. “Five minutes,” I said, and walked away, but my heart was still going just as fast as before. This was only half over. Was it five minutes until I pulled this off? Or five minutes to live?”

— James Patterson

394. “I hugged everyone, sat down beside Cindy Thomas and Yuki Castellano, Claire’s best girlfriends and mine, the four of us making up the entire membership of what we half jokingly call the “Women’s Murder Club.”

— James Patterson

395. “Let’s show Dr. God what hell feels like.”

— James Patterson

396. “If Fang is in any way harmed while I’m gone-if he gets a hangnail-you won’t see another morning. Are we clear on that?”

— James Patterson

397. “I’d have everything money could buy, but it wouldn’t be the same as having everything i wanted. Not even close.”

— James Patterson

398. “Fang snapped out his huge wings and shone the penlight under his chin so it raked his cheekbones and eyes. My mouth dropped open: He looked like the angel of death.”

— James Patterson

399. “Can we ever really judge behavior by the behavior itself? Lesson learned. Most often, we can’t.”

— James Patterson

400. “Advice: Don’t wait until someone you have issues with – especially someone you’re related to – gets shot before you work it out.”

— James Patterson