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Top 100 Milton Berle Quotes (2025 Update)
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Milton Berle Quote: “I wanted to get the guy who works next to me in the office something he really wants, but how do you wrap up a saloon?”

101. “I wanted to get the guy who works next to me in the office something he really wants, but how do you wrap up a saloon?”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “It’s rough to go through life with your contents looking as if they settled during shipping.”

102. “It’s rough to go through life with your contents looking as if they settled during shipping.”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “We owe a lot to Thomas Edison-if it wasn’t for him, we’d be watching television by candlelight.”

103. “We owe a lot to Thomas Edison-if it wasn’t for him, we’d be watching television by candlelight.”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “She wanted an Italian sports car – with the sport still in it.”

104. “She wanted an Italian sports car – with the sport still in it.”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “I bought my son an indestructible toy. Yesterday he left it in the driveway. It broke my car.”

105. “I bought my son an indestructible toy. Yesterday he left it in the driveway. It broke my car.”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “The last time I saw Marilyn was in late 1959, when I appeared in Let’s Make Love at Fox. The wide-eyed Marilyn I had first known was gone. This Marilyn was more beautiful than ever.”

106. “The last time I saw Marilyn was in late 1959, when I appeared in Let’s Make Love at Fox. The wide-eyed Marilyn I had first known was gone. This Marilyn was more beautiful than ever.”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay.”

107. “My wife is a real Puritan. She thinks licking the stamp on the envelope of a Valentine is foreplay.”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “Sir, I didn’t deserve the grade you gave me on this test. Do you know a lower one?”

108. “Sir, I didn’t deserve the grade you gave me on this test. Do you know a lower one?”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “You don’t need to travel, laughter is an instant vacation.”

109. “You don’t need to travel, laughter is an instant vacation.”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “I bought my kid an educational toy to help him make it through life. No matter how you put it together, it’s wrong.”

110. “I bought my kid an educational toy to help him make it through life. No matter how you put it together, it’s wrong.”

— Milton Berle

Milton Berle Quote: “Valentine’s Day – a nice holiday because it’s the first day of the rest of your wife.”

111. “Valentine’s Day – a nice holiday because it’s the first day of the rest of your wife.”

— Milton Berle

Motivational Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

Positive Quotes

Positive Quotes

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Motivational Quotes

Motivational Quotes

INSPIRATIONAL SUCCESS MOTIVATIONAL

Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

ENTREPRENEURSHIP BUSINESS INSPIRATIONAL

Positive Quotes

Positive Quotes

Optimism Quotes

Optimism Quotes

Mental Health Quotes

Mental Health Quotes

Career Development Quotes

Career Development Quotes

Hilarious Quotes

Hilarious Quotes

Inspirational Career Quotes

Inspirational Career Quotes

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