Top 100

Top 250 Bill Watterson Quotes (2024 Update)
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Bill Watterson Quote: “You are demoted from First Tiger to bulk rate.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Often it takes some calamity to make us live in the present. Then suddenly we wake up and see all the mistakes we have made.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I’d say our afternoon just got booked solid!”
Bill Watterson Quote: “In the short term, it would make me happy to go play outside. In the long term, it would make me happier to do well at school and become successful. But in the VERY long term, I know which will make better memories.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Boy, there’s nothing worse than an inscrutable omen.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Well, remember what you said, because in a day or two, I’ll have a witty and blistering retort! You’ll be devastated THEN.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “They say the secret of success is being at the right place at the right time, but since you never know when the right time is going to be, I figure the trick is to find the right place and just hang around.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I can never enjoy Sundays, because in the back of my mind I always know I’ve got to go to school the next day. It’s like trying to enjoy your last meal before the execution.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Happiness is being famous for your financial ability to indulge in every kind of excess.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I keep forgetting that rules are only for little nice people.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I’ve always been a huge fan of fantasy and adventure, putting yourself in someone else’s shoes, I’m sure that’s why I’m an actor. It’s why I played with action figures as a kid, that’s why I wrote and drew and read comics as a kid.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “CALVIN: Our hero regains consciousness at the feet of a sarcastic alien.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “My problem is that I don’t paint ambitiously. It’s all catch and release – just tiny fish that aren’t really worth the trouble to clean and cook.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Nowadays, ads don’t just sell a product. They sell an attitude! Look at this one! Here’s a cool guy saying nobody tells him what to do. He does whatever he wants and he buys this product as a reflection of that independence. So basically, this maverick is urging everyone to express his individuality through conformity in brand-name selection?”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Leave it to a girl to take the fun out of sex discrimination.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Instead of asking what’s wrong with rampant consumerism, we ought to be asking, ‘What justifies it?’ Popular art does not have to pander to the lowest level of intelligence and taste.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Mom and dad say I should make my life an example of the principles I believe in. But every time I do, they tell me to stop it.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “But Calvin is no kind and loving god! He’s one of the old gods! He demands sacrifice!”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I’ve never understood people who remember childhood as an idyllic time.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “CALVIN: When I grow up I want to be an inventor. First I will invent a time machine. Then I’ll come back to yesterday and take myself to tomorrow and skip this dumb assignment.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I write separately from the inking up. I’m sure this varies from cartoonist to cartoonist; I find that the writing is the hard part and the drawing is the fun part.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “In the right hands, a comic strip attains a beauty and elegance that, really, I would put against any other art.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Specifically, I’d like to debate whether cannibalism ought to be grounds for leniency in murders, since it’s less wasteful.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I’ll bet my autopsy reveals my mouth is too big.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Verbing weirds language.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “It’s gratifying to hear that from people who care about comic art. I never know what to make of it when someone writes to say, “Calvin and Hobbes is the best strip in the paper. I like it even more than Nancy.””
Bill Watterson Quote: “MOMMMM, I’m thirsty... What’s this, just water?”
Bill Watterson Quote: “If I had rolled along with the strip’s popularity and repeated myself for another five, 10 or 20 years, the people now ‘grieving’ for ‘Calvin and Hobbes’ would be wishing me dead.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “It’s going to be a grim day when the world is run by a generation that doesn’t know anything but what it’s seen on TV.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I think hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient’s friends.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “That’s the whole problem with science. You’ve got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Surprise is the essence of humor, and nothing is more surprising than truth.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I think most of us would be horrified to meet ourselves and discover what everyone else already knows about us.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “You can draw a penguin on a toilet reading The New York Times and it’s adorable, but try doing it with an adult male character, and it’s disgusting.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Oh lovely snowball, packed with care, smack a head that’s unaware! Then with freezing ice to spare, melt and soak through underwear! Fly straight and true, hit hard and square! This, oh snowball, is my prayer. I only throw consecrated snowballs.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “You never know when some crazed rodent with cold feet could be running loose in your pants.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “When birds burp, it must taste like bugs.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I think of football as a sport the way ducks think of hunting as a sport.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I think comics overall would be better. I think there’s a tremendous potential to be tapped.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “I won’t eat any cereal that doesn’t turn the milk purple.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Virtual reality has nothing on Calvin.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “If you’ve ever compared a film to a novel it’s based on, you know the novel gets bludgeoned. It’s inevitable, because different media have different strengths and needs, and when you make a movie, the movie’s needs get served.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “For me, it’s been liberating to put myself in the mind of a fictitious six year-old each day, and rediscover my own curiosity. I’ve been amazed at how one idea leads to others if I allow my mind to play and wander.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “The strips I admire go farther than a gag a day, and take us into a special world.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Yeah, but actually, I’ve got the same questions about God.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “Idiocy is the essence of the male mind.”
Bill Watterson Quote: “It’s surprising how hard we’ll work when the work is done just for ourselves.”
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