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Chuck Palahniuk Quotes
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Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “In good old Colonial Dunsboro, masochism is a valuable job skill. It is in most jobs.”

In good old Colonial Dunsboro, masochism is a valuable job skill. It is in most jobs.

— Chuck Palahniuk



Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Of all the priceless objects left behind, this is what we rescue. These artifacts. Memory cues. Useless souvenirs. Nothing you could auction. The scars left from happiness.”

Of all the priceless objects left behind, this is what we rescue. These artifacts. Memory cues. Useless souvenirs. Nothing you could auction. The scars left from happiness.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “It’s because we’re so trapped in our culture, in the being of being human on this planet with the brains we have, and the same two arms and legs everybody has. We’re so trapped that any way we could imagine to escape would be just another part of the trap. Anything we want, we’re trained to want.”

It’s because we’re so trapped in our culture, in the being of being human on this planet with the brains we have, and the same two arms and legs everybody has. We’re so trapped that any way we could imagine to escape would be just another part of the trap. Anything we want, we’re trained to want.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Our purest form of joy comes when people we envy get hurt. That most genuine form of joy.”

Our purest form of joy comes when people we envy get hurt. That most genuine form of joy.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “No matter what happens, it’s always now.”

No matter what happens, it’s always now.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Maybe this is why Misty loved him. Loved you. Because you believed in her so much more than she did. You expected more from her than she did from herself.”

Maybe this is why Misty loved him. Loved you. Because you believed in her so much more than she did. You expected more from her than she did from herself.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “I thought why not write a kind of mystery, murder, thriller book, but use romance language where the language plays completely against the very dark subject matter, that very strange murderous plot, but use that Harlequin Romance language.”

I thought why not write a kind of mystery, murder, thriller book, but use romance language where the language plays completely against the very dark subject matter, that very strange murderous plot, but use that Harlequin Romance language.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “And if you believe that we really have free will, then you know that God can’t really control us. And since God can’t control us, all God does is watch and change channels when He gets bored.”

And if you believe that we really have free will, then you know that God can’t really control us. And since God can’t control us, all God does is watch and change channels when He gets bored.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “I’m always trying to reach a transcendent point, a romantic point, but reach it in a really unconventional way, a really profane way. To get to that romantic, touching, heartbreaking place, but through a lot of acts of profanity.”

I’m always trying to reach a transcendent point, a romantic point, but reach it in a really unconventional way, a really profane way. To get to that romantic, touching, heartbreaking place, but through a lot of acts of profanity.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Give me rampant intellectualism as a coping mechanism.”

Give me rampant intellectualism as a coping mechanism.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “There are worse things you can do to the people you love than kill them. The regular way is just to watch the world do it. Just read the newspaper.”

There are worse things you can do to the people you love than kill them. The regular way is just to watch the world do it. Just read the newspaper.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “New carpet will exude poisonous formaldehyde for up to two years after it’d been laid. I know the feeling.”

New carpet will exude poisonous formaldehyde for up to two years after it’d been laid. I know the feeling.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Only through destroying myself can I discover the greater power of my spirit.”

Only through destroying myself can I discover the greater power of my spirit.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “I am Joe’s Enraged, Inflamed, sense of rejection.”

I am Joe’s Enraged, Inflamed, sense of rejection.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Think of spoiled cat food and ulcerated cankers and expired donor organs. That’s how beautiful she looks.”

Think of spoiled cat food and ulcerated cankers and expired donor organs. That’s how beautiful she looks.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “We just had a near-life experience!”

We just had a near-life experience!

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “At the last minute, I couldn’t wear the Hitler mustache because Tiger Stripe ate it; and then I didn’t want to take my kitty and risk his coughing up some big Nazi hairball on someone’s front stoop.”

At the last minute, I couldn’t wear the Hitler mustache because Tiger Stripe ate it; and then I didn’t want to take my kitty and risk his coughing up some big Nazi hairball on someone’s front stoop.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Every time we burn a gallon of gas or an acre of rain forest, aren’t we killing the future to preserve the present?”

Every time we burn a gallon of gas or an acre of rain forest, aren’t we killing the future to preserve the present?

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “It’s a fun playtime. Please, don’t kill it with big words.”

It’s a fun playtime. Please, don’t kill it with big words.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “People die’, she says. ‘People tear down houses. But furniture, fine, beautiful furniture, it just goes on and on, surviving everything.’ She says, ’Armoires are the cockroaches of our culture.”

People die’, she says. ‘People tear down houses. But furniture, fine, beautiful furniture, it just goes on and on, surviving everything.’ She says, ’Armoires are the cockroaches of our culture.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Why is it you feel like a dope if you laugh alone, but that’s usually how you end up crying?”

Why is it you feel like a dope if you laugh alone, but that’s usually how you end up crying?

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “I really love idiot, enlightened characters – these characters who fail to engage with the drama of their immediate circumstances; they fail to be reactive and enrolled by drama as it happens around them.”

I really love idiot, enlightened characters – these characters who fail to engage with the drama of their immediate circumstances; they fail to be reactive and enrolled by drama as it happens around them.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Someone bent on suicide won’t have much sense of humor left.”

Someone bent on suicide won’t have much sense of humor left.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “The bigger the mistake looks, the better chance I’ll have to break out and live a real life. Our real discoveries come from chaos. – Brandy Alexander.”

The bigger the mistake looks, the better chance I’ll have to break out and live a real life. Our real discoveries come from chaos. – Brandy Alexander.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “A couple drinks. A couple aspirin. Repeat.”

A couple drinks. A couple aspirin. Repeat.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “No matter how bad things get, you can still walk away.”

No matter how bad things get, you can still walk away.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “What they don’t teach you in art school is how your whole life is about discovering who you already were.”

What they don’t teach you in art school is how your whole life is about discovering who you already were.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Hope is something really tough and tenacious you have to give up. It’s an addiction to break.”

Hope is something really tough and tenacious you have to give up. It’s an addiction to break.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Do we have free will, or do the mass media and our culture control us, our desires and actions, from the moment we’re born?”

Do we have free will, or do the mass media and our culture control us, our desires and actions, from the moment we’re born?

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Ask yourself: What did I eat for breakfast today? What did I eat for dinner last night? You see how fast reality fades away?”

Ask yourself: What did I eat for breakfast today? What did I eat for dinner last night? You see how fast reality fades away?

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “When both of you are beautiful, neither of you is beautiful. Together, as a couple, you’re less than the sum of your parts.”

When both of you are beautiful, neither of you is beautiful. Together, as a couple, you’re less than the sum of your parts.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “The lucky ones are just born dead.”

The lucky ones are just born dead.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “We thought all this teaching was to make us smart. What it did was make us stupid. With all the little facts we learned, we never had the time to think.”

We thought all this teaching was to make us smart. What it did was make us stupid. With all the little facts we learned, we never had the time to think.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “A child who is disillusioned abruptly, by his peers or siblings, being ridiculed for his faith and imagination, may choose never to believe in anything- tangible or intangible- again. To never trust or wonder.”

A child who is disillusioned abruptly, by his peers or siblings, being ridiculed for his faith and imagination, may choose never to believe in anything- tangible or intangible- again. To never trust or wonder.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “And if I do fall asleep, Marla has to keep track of Tyler. Where he goes. What he does. So maybe during the day, I can rush around and undo the damage.”

And if I do fall asleep, Marla has to keep track of Tyler. Where he goes. What he does. So maybe during the day, I can rush around and undo the damage.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “I am a writer and the greatest compliment I can get is to know that I’ve contributed language to the culture, that I’ve defined something, given it a name. So I think that is one of the great things a writer can do.”

I am a writer and the greatest compliment I can get is to know that I’ve contributed language to the culture, that I’ve defined something, given it a name. So I think that is one of the great things a writer can do.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Brandy is so attractive you could chop her head off and put it on blue velvet in the window at Tiffany’s and somebody would buy it for a million dollars.”

Brandy is so attractive you could chop her head off and put it on blue velvet in the window at Tiffany’s and somebody would buy it for a million dollars.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “We went sailing one time, and he wore a Speedo, and any smart woman should know that means bisexual at least.”

We went sailing one time, and he wore a Speedo, and any smart woman should know that means bisexual at least.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Every generation wants to be the last.”

Every generation wants to be the last.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “That if you could acquire enough, accomplish enough, you’d never want to own or do another thing. That if you could eat or sleep enough, you’d never need more. That if enough people loved you, you’d stop needing love.”

That if you could acquire enough, accomplish enough, you’d never want to own or do another thing. That if you could eat or sleep enough, you’d never need more. That if enough people loved you, you’d stop needing love.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “On game shows, some people will take the trip to France, but most people will take the washer and dryer pair.”

On game shows, some people will take the trip to France, but most people will take the washer and dryer pair.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Some little part of themselves for someone in the future to discover. Maybe a thought. We were here. We built this. A reminder.”

Some little part of themselves for someone in the future to discover. Maybe a thought. We were here. We built this. A reminder.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Since we do operate in a binary world, if there’s something that cannot be this or that, it drives us crazy.”

Since we do operate in a binary world, if there’s something that cannot be this or that, it drives us crazy.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “You have to keep recycling yourself.”

You have to keep recycling yourself.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “What I did was pour out about a gallon of Chanel Number Five and put a burning wedding invitation to it, and boom, I’m recycling.”

What I did was pour out about a gallon of Chanel Number Five and put a burning wedding invitation to it, and boom, I’m recycling.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “A moment is all you can expect from perfection.”

A moment is all you can expect from perfection.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “When you’re thinking about the rest of your life, you’re never really thinking more than a couple years down the road.”

When you’re thinking about the rest of your life, you’re never really thinking more than a couple years down the road.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “Because I can’t hit bottom, I can’t be saved.”

Because I can’t hit bottom, I can’t be saved.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “The cancer I don’t have is everywhere now.”

The cancer I don’t have is everywhere now.

— Chuck Palahniuk


Chuck Palahniuk Quote: “We’re so structured and micromanaged, this isn’t a world anymore, it’s a damn cruise ship.”

We’re so structured and micromanaged, this isn’t a world anymore, it’s a damn cruise ship.

— Chuck Palahniuk

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