Top 500 Chuck Palahniuk Quotes (2025 Update)
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251. “You gain power by pretending to be weak.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

252. “We’ve been speaking English as a second language so long that we’ve forgotten it as our first.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

253. “That’s the American Dream: to make your life into something you can sell.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

254. “We don’t have a great war in our generation, or a great depression, but we do, we have a great war of the spirit. We have a great revolution against the culture. The great depression is our lives. We have a spiritual depression.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

255. “If you’re not drunk and half naked by this point, you’re not paying attention.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

256. “To some of us, the nights are too long. To some, the days.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

257. “The joke is, we all have the same punchline.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

258. “You decide your own level of involvement.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

259. “When nobody will look at you, you can stare a hole in them. Picking out all the little details you’d never stare long enough to get if they’d even just return your gaze, this, this is your revenge.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

260. “According to Plato, we don’t learn anything. Our soul has lived so many lives that we know everything. Teachers and education can only remind us of what we already know.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

261. “In a world where billions believe their deity conceived a mortal child with a virgin human, it’s stunning how little imagination most people display.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

262. “I think standardization is really the first step to something being commodified.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

263. “The only difference between suicide and martyrdom is press coverage.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

264. “Maybe we should always assume the worst.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

265. “Our humanity isn’t measured by how we treat other people, our humanity is measured by how we treat animals.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

266. “People take conventional ways that other people have always decorated their cars, and use them as ways of giving other people permission to approach them.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

267. “More and more, it feels like I’m doing a really bad impersonation of myself.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

268. “Everybody looks a little crazy if you’re looking close enough and if you can’t look that close, then you don’t really love them.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

269. “Getting fired,’ Tyler says, ’is the best thing that could happen to any of us. That way, we’d quit treading water and do something with our lives.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

270. “Some people still think knowledge is power.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

271. “Young people want mirrors. Older people want art.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

272. “I used to work in a funeral home to feel good about myself, just the fact that I was breathing.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

273. “Love is a skill you learn.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

274. “My father never went to college so it was really important I go to college. After college, I called him long distance and said, now what? My dad didn’t know. When I got a job and turned twenty-five, long distance, I said, now what? My dad didn’t know, so he said, get married. I’m a thirty-year-old boy, and I’m wondering if another woman is really the answer I need.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

275. “There’s always the chance you could die right in the middle of your life story.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

276. “No matter what happens, it’s always now.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

277. “I take a lot of flak from the counter-establishment for selling out.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

278. “For the record, knowing when people are only pretending to like you isn’t such a great skill to have.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

279. “I want to find something else, unknowable, some place that’s not on the map. A real adventure.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

280. “As a lower-class kid, I was raised to think success would be owning stuff. Having that great job, too. Now I find my parents’ dream was wrong. You never really own anything. And you’re never really finished as a person.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

281. “We all have some proper noun to blame.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

282. “Everything is funnier in retrospect, funnier and prettier and cooler. You can laugh at anything from far enough away.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

283. “May I never be complete. May I never be content. May I never be perfect. Deliver me, Tyler, from being perfect and complete.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

284. “Yes, Icarus fell to earth after flying too close to the sun, but what a glorious fall it must have been. Almost worth the flaming wings tied to his arms, waving helplessly in a shower of.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

285. “Because everything up to now is a story and everything after now is a story.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

286. “A comedy ends with a wedding, and a tragedy ends with a funeral: you always have to juxtapose sex and death.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

287. “Las Vegas looks the way you’d imagine heaven must look at night.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

288. “I tiger can smile A snake will say it loves you Lies make us evil.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

289. “Tyler’s words coming out of my mouth. I used to be such a nice person.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

290. “Burn the Louvre, and wipe your ass with the Mona Lisa. This way at least, God would know our names.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

291. “It’s easy to attack and destroy an act of creation. It’s a lot more difficult to perform one.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

292. “No matter how much you love someone, you still want to have you own way.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

293. “When did the future switch from being a promise to a threat?”

— Chuck Palahniuk

294. “What people forget is a journey to nowhere starts with a single step, too.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

295. “Being tired isn’t the same as being rich, but most times it’s close enough.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

296. “We’ve taken the world apart but we have no idea what to do with the pieces.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

297. “Every woman is just a different kind of problem.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

298. “Disaster is a natural part of my evolution toward tragedy and dissolution.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

299. “It’s not love or anything, but I think I like you, too.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

300. “After a good-looking boy gives you rabies two, three times, you’ll settle down and marry somebody less exciting for the rest of your life.”

— Chuck Palahniuk