Top 500 Chuck Palahniuk Quotes (2025 Update)
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301. “You turn up your music to hide the noise. Other people turn up their music to hide yours. You turn up yours again. Everyone buy s a bigger stereo system. This is the arms race of sound. You don’t win with a lot of treble.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

302. “Get married before the sex gets boring or you’ll never get married.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

303. “The weather today is an increasing trend towards denial.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

304. “The future you have, tomorrow, won’t be the same future you had, yesterday.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

305. “I came to Party Crashing because accidents happen. People you love will die. Nothing you treasure will last forever. And I need to accept and embrace that fact.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

306. “Because nothing is as good as you can imagine it. No one is as beautiful as she is in your head. Nothing is as exciting as your fantasy.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

307. “You realize that there’s no point in doing anything if nobody’s watching. You wonder, if there had been a low turnout at the crucifixion, would they have rescheduled?”

— Chuck Palahniuk

308. “Hysteria is impossible without an audience. Panicking by yourself is the same as laughing alone in an empty room. You feel really silly.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

309. “There are a lot of things we don’t want to know about the people we love.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

310. “I am nothing, and not even that.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

311. “The evil queen was stupid to play Snow White’s game. There’s an age where a woman has to move on to another kind of power. Money, for example. Or a gun.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

312. “The weather today is partly angry, leading to resignation and ultimatums.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

313. “It’s not enough to be numbered with the grains of sand on the beach and the stars in the sky.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

314. “Recycling and speed limits are bullshit. They’re like someone who quits smoking on his deathbed.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

315. “It’s because we’re so trapped in our culture, in the being of being human on this planet with the brains we have, and the same two arms and legs everybody has. We’re so trapped that any way we could imagine to escape would be just another part of the trap. Anything we want, we’re trained to want.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

316. “The liberator who destroys my property is fighting to save my spirit. The teacher who clears all possessions from my path will set me free.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

317. “After you find out all the things that can go wrong, your life becomes less about living and more about waiting.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

318. “I am the child of a lunatic. Not a child of God.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

319. “To merely observe your culture without contributing to it seems very close to existing as a ghost.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

320. “You ever wonder when god’s coming back with a lot of barbecue sauce?”

— Chuck Palahniuk

321. “You take a 98-percent concentration of fuming nitric acid and add the acid to three times that amount of sulfuric acid. Do this in an ice bath. Then add glycerin drop-by-drop with an eye dropper. You have nitroglycerin.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

322. “If you start in the pit of despair with these profane, awful things, even a glimmer of hope or awareness is going to occur that’s much brighter coming from this dark, awful beginning.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

323. “A minute of perfection was worth the effort. A moment was the most you could ever expect from perfection.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

324. “Leonardo’s Mona Lisa is just a thousand thousand smears of paint. Michelangelo’s David is just a million hits with a hammer. We’re all of us a million bits put together the right way.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

325. “Give me lust, baby. Flash. Give me malice. Flash. Give me detached existentialist ennui. Flash. Give me rampant intellectualism as a coping mechanism. Flash.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

326. “Mylife might be little and boring, but at least it’s mine – not some assembly-line, secondhand, hand-me-down life.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

327. “Just let yourself be broken and humiliated. Just your whole life, keep telling people, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry...”

— Chuck Palahniuk

328. “It’s funny how the beauty of art has so much more to do with the frame than the artwork itself.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

329. “Besides, it happens fast for some people and slow for some, accidents or gravity, but we all end up mutilated. Most women know this feeling of being more and more invisible everyday.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

330. “This is less teaching than damage control. You may as well paint a house that’s on fire.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

331. “There are bodies buried everywhere you just have to know where to look.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

332. “Do we have free will, or do the mass media and our culture control us, our desires and actions, from the moment we’re born?”

— Chuck Palahniuk

333. “Some writers research in order to write. I write in order to research topics that interest me. Especially if I can meet with other people, in forums from illness support groups to phone-sex hotlines, and learn what other people know best.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

334. “Either a species learns to control its own population, or something like disease, famine, war, will take care of the issue.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

335. “These flowers will be rotten in a couple hours. Birds will crap on them. The smoke here will make them stink, and tomorrow a bulldozer will probably run over them, but for right now they are so beautiful.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

336. “Not everything is about money. You didn’t even say, hello. You are not your sad little wallet.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

337. “You see, life only turns out good or bad for only a little bit. And then it turns out some other way.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

338. “People are all over the world telling their one dramatic story and how their life has turned into getting over this one event. Now their lives are more about the past than their future.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

339. “We all want to explain ourselves. Nobody wants to be forgotten.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

340. “Crying is right at hand in the smothering dark, closed inside someone else, when you see how everything you can ever accomplish will end up as trash.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

341. “What we think of as Halloween is really the product of media barons, city mayors, and candy-makers. You know, before the 1920s, Halloween was really a terrible, terrible night.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

342. “Imagine books and music and movies being filtered and homogenized. Certified. Approved for consumption. People will be happy to give up most of their culture for the assurance that the tiny bit that comes through is safe and clean. White noise.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

343. “A knife, it felt like a knife, and I’d discovered that despite everything that’s happened, I still had an endless untapped potential for getting hurt.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

344. “You cannot be the person they know and the great, glorious person you want to become. Not at the same time.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

345. “Since change is constant, you wonder if people crave death because it’s the only way they can get anything really finished.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

346. “Every character sees the world through a framework of education and experience that they’re proud experts about. To write a character, find out what they know best, and THEN you’ll know how they’ll describe a “hot day.” Or a “pretty girl.””

— Chuck Palahniuk

347. “Find good in what the world says is evil.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

348. “Hope is something really tough and tenacious you have to give up. It’s an addiction to break.”

— Chuck Palahniuk

349. “We just had a near-life experience!”

— Chuck Palahniuk

350. “People have to really suffer before they can risk doing what they love.”

— Chuck Palahniuk