Top 400 Gail Carriger Quotes (2024 Update)
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301. “How was I to know idiocy was only a temporary condition, especially in your case? It never has been before!”

— Gail Carriger

302. “Tea is her answer to everything. I once broke my arm and she tried to give me Lapsang Souchong.”

— Gail Carriger

303. “Professor Lyall puffed out his cheeks in exasperation. It was like trying to have a conversation with a distracted and very soggy scone. Every time he pushed in one direction the earl either oozed or crumbled.”

— Gail Carriger

304. “Professor Braithwope, shimmering out of his room fully clothed and dapper. His mustache was a fluffy caterpillar of curiosity, perched and ready to inquire, dragging the vampire along behind it on the investigation.”

— Gail Carriger

305. “No, Lord Maccon was riproaring, tumble down, without a doubt, pickled beyond the gherkin.”

— Gail Carriger

306. “I had a recent delivery of new fashion plates from Paris, and you hardly glanced at the hairstyles. My husband tells me you are still having difficulty controlling the change. And your cravat has been tied very simply of late, even for evening events.”

— Gail Carriger

307. “Follow that porcupine!”

— Gail Carriger

308. “Having delivered the expected daily miracle, Floote stood in his usual stance and warily watched the Templars work.”

— Gail Carriger

309. “It was a constant source of amazement to Alexia that the only thing she had ever done in her entire life that pleased her mama was marry a werewolf.”

— Gail Carriger

310. “Alexia blinked stupidly at the Beta from around the earl’s upper arm. Her heart was doing crazy things, and she still could not locate her kneecaps. She took a deep breath and put some serious attention into tracking them down.”

— Gail Carriger

311. “The werewolf hit the exsanguination chamber in a vicious storm of fang and claw and began unceremoniously tearing everything apart. Including the scientists.”

— Gail Carriger

312. “Well, life with Percy was probably extremely dull. “And Footnote, miss?” “Footnote?” “Himself’s cat.”

— Gail Carriger

313. “Oh, Percy, I hate it when you’re right.” He patted her shoulder. “I know, Rue, apologies.”

— Gail Carriger

314. “Falling out of the sky was one thing, but doing so for unknown reasons was quite unacceptable. Having.”

— Gail Carriger

315. “Monsters came in all shapes and sizes, and very few of them were actually supernatural. She.”

— Gail Carriger

316. “I’d rather be loyal than right.”

— Gail Carriger

317. “Frankly, Percy was accustomed to offending people into near murderous rages. When someone actually tried to pot him off, it felt endearingly honest.”

— Gail Carriger

318. “I’ll do it,” insisted Arsenic, helping Percy to rise. He supposed a thousand Englishmen around the world cried out that he took aid from a woman, but he was never one to accept lightly the illogicality of custom. Tradition seemed to him a poor excuse for inconvenience. Also he rather enjoyed her fussing over him.”

— Gail Carriger

319. “Alexia abhorred hypocrisy, especially when munitions were involved.”

— Gail Carriger

320. “The important question is, what will your wear for a wedding dress, Alexia? You look horrible in white.”

— Gail Carriger

321. “Oh, dear me, no. Then I should be known as that vampire with all the cats.”

— Gail Carriger

322. “His eyes were jet-colored circles of perpetual disapproval.”

— Gail Carriger

323. “Are you certain they will manage without me?” “We will be back in only a few hours. How bad can it get?” “Don’t tempt fate, my love.”

— Gail Carriger

324. “Alexia had spent long hours wondering over that mustache. Werewolves did not grow hair, as they did not age. Where had it come from? Had he always had it? For how many centuries had his poor abused upper lip labored under the burden of such vegetation?”

— Gail Carriger

325. “Always, there was a tiny part of her that wanted to kill any man she knew. On principle.”

— Gail Carriger

326. “A vampire attacked me last night.” Ivy pretended a faint.”

— Gail Carriger

327. “The greatest unwritten law of the supernatural set was that one simply didn’t steal someone else’s human.”

— Gail Carriger

328. “Classic author moment, “Oh dear, did I kill that character or not?”

— Gail Carriger

329. “Just a short visit, enough for a mild dismemberment?”

— Gail Carriger

330. “Rain, in your glorious presence, Miss Temminnick? I hardly think it should dare.”

— Gail Carriger

331. “Lady Maccon declined in horror. She enjoyed most foods, but brussels sprouts were nothing more than underdeveloped cabbages.”

— Gail Carriger

332. “Look at the plucky young thing! She is trying to make a funny,” said Lord Ambrose snidely.”

— Gail Carriger

333. “If left together for too long, the two of them might actually take over the civilized world, through sheer application of snide remarks.”

— Gail Carriger

334. “His animal form was nondescript but tidy, rather like his favorite waistcoat: his pelt the same sandy color as his hair but with a sheen of black about the face and neck. He was not very big, mostly because he was not a very big human, and the basic principles of conservation of mass still applied whether supernatural or not. Werewolves had to obey the laws of physics just like everyone else. The.”

— Gail Carriger

335. “Alexia wondered what he thought of her as – a cat perhaps? Cats were not, in her experience, an animal with much soul.”

— Gail Carriger

336. “Lady Maccon wondered if she had ever been so foolish over Lord Maccon. Then she recalled that her affection generally took the form of threats and verbal barbs. She gave herself a pat on the back for avoiding sentimentality.”

— Gail Carriger

337. “Mortals trotted about in shoes and corsets made to limit movement, fashion for prey.”

— Gail Carriger

338. “Perched in one corner, like some sort of ship’s figurehead, was an oddly sinister wicker chicken. It frowned down upon her with an air of chubby disdain.”

— Gail Carriger

339. “She’s kind of like an odd, loud, fierce fairy godmother, isn’t she?”

— Gail Carriger

340. “He was still unsure as to how Lyall had, in fact, managed to keep him in London all these days. Betas, in the end, were mysterious creatures with strange powers. Powers that, when all was said and done, seemed to involve nothing more than a continued battery of civilized behavior and an excess of manners. Effective, blast him.”

— Gail Carriger

341. “Alexia found herself surrounded and embraced by a room of such unmitigated welcome and personality that it was akin to being yelled at by plum pudding.”

— Gail Carriger

342. “Miss Tarabotti felt such rules did not entirely apply to her, as she was a spinster. Had been a spinster for as long as she could remember. In her more acerbic moments, she felt she had been born a spinster.”

— Gail Carriger

343. “In for the boil, might as well steam.”

— Gail Carriger

344. “Very well, Lord Maccon. If we are going to play this particular hand, would you be interested in becoming my... ” “Mistress?”

— Gail Carriger

345. “It was typical of her character that she simply assumed she would, eventually, gain control over the situation.”

— Gail Carriger

346. “No, miss, friendship would be a finish.”

— Gail Carriger

347. “The man was dead after all. But not powerless. Formerly Floote was many things, but powerless wasn’t one of them. He had knowledge.”

— Gail Carriger

348. “The sofa clattered back into motion and came after her but was confined to the shed. It stopped in the doorway, glaring at her and shaking threatening tassels – if an object without eyes can be said to glare. Sophronia felt sorry for the chaise longue, but she wasn’t going to risk being caught in order to mollify a gaudy piece of furniture.”

— Gail Carriger

349. “I hate missing everything. That’s why I want to marry well and be a grand lady. Then I can host all the parties, all the time, and see everything that is going on always. How can you stand not knowing?”

— Gail Carriger

350. “Ever since her trip with Alexia to Scotland, Mrs. Tunstell had rather a taste for foreign travel. Alexia blamed it on the kilts.”

— Gail Carriger