Top 400 Gail Carriger Quotes (2025 Update)
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301. “Her heart was beating a marathon somewhere in the region of her throat, her skin felt hot and stretched taut over her bones, and she was damp in places she was tolerably certain unmarried gentlewomen were not supposed to be damp in.”

— Gail Carriger

302. “It didn’t feel sporting to shoot at a crazy person, even if that person was a vampire who’d agreed to the job.”

— Gail Carriger

303. “Desperately Dimity mentioned badminton. I mean to say, who doesn’t have opinions on badminton? Everyone has opinions on badminton.”

— Gail Carriger

304. “She had to give her teachers credit: they were right to insist all pupils carry scissors, handkerchiefs, perfume and hair ribbons at all times. At some point she’d learn why they also required a red lace doily and a lemon.”

— Gail Carriger

305. “Truth be told, even with Sophronia’s arm muscles, vampires could hurl her a great deal farther than Sophronia could hurl vampires. A great tragedy of life, no doubt. The.”

— Gail Carriger

306. “Rue gave a little mental sigh. No one would ever describe her as deadly attractive. She brightened a bit. Perhaps she could aspire to just deadly?”

— Gail Carriger

307. “The Pistons were partly distracted by this short but excitingly fiery chase, and partly distracted by a new threat in the form of a small but enraged Dimity. Dimity, bless her heart, was reciting one of Mademoiselle Geraldine’s longest lectures on proper behavior at a dance, finger shaking in autocratic fury, Lord Dingleproops notwithstanding.”

— Gail Carriger

308. “He figured someday he might win an argument with this extraordinary woman, but clearly today was not that day. “Did.”

— Gail Carriger

309. “Ooh, ooh, ooh!” Ivy was practically bouncing in excitement over some kind of revelation. “I had a thought,” she said, examining the edge of the wooden stake with interest. “Oh, yes?” encouraged Alexia loudly. Ivy stopped and frowned, her pert little face creased in worry. “I said I had one. It appears to have vanished.”

— Gail Carriger

310. “Just a short visit, enough for a mild dismemberment?”

— Gail Carriger

311. “This is madness. Oh, well.”

— Gail Carriger

312. “It was their vampire teacher’s custom of late to administer decidedly oddball lessons. Which is to say, more oddball than an ordinary lesson with a vampire in a floating dirigible espionage school.”

— Gail Carriger

313. “Rain, in your glorious presence, Miss Temminnick? I hardly think it should dare.”

— Gail Carriger

314. “Lady Maccon declined in horror. She enjoyed most foods, but brussels sprouts were nothing more than underdeveloped cabbages.”

— Gail Carriger

315. “Look at the plucky young thing! She is trying to make a funny,” said Lord Ambrose snidely.”

— Gail Carriger

316. “If left together for too long, the two of them might actually take over the civilized world, through sheer application of snide remarks.”

— Gail Carriger

317. “His animal form was nondescript but tidy, rather like his favorite waistcoat: his pelt the same sandy color as his hair but with a sheen of black about the face and neck. He was not very big, mostly because he was not a very big human, and the basic principles of conservation of mass still applied whether supernatural or not. Werewolves had to obey the laws of physics just like everyone else. The.”

— Gail Carriger

318. “Having delivered the expected daily miracle, Floote stood in his usual stance and warily watched the Templars work.”

— Gail Carriger

319. “It was a constant source of amazement to Alexia that the only thing she had ever done in her entire life that pleased her mama was marry a werewolf.”

— Gail Carriger

320. “Alexia blinked stupidly at the Beta from around the earl’s upper arm. Her heart was doing crazy things, and she still could not locate her kneecaps. She took a deep breath and put some serious attention into tracking them down.”

— Gail Carriger

321. “Well, life with Percy was probably extremely dull. “And Footnote, miss?” “Footnote?” “Himself’s cat.”

— Gail Carriger

322. “Oh, Percy, I hate it when you’re right.” He patted her shoulder. “I know, Rue, apologies.”

— Gail Carriger

323. “Falling out of the sky was one thing, but doing so for unknown reasons was quite unacceptable. Having.”

— Gail Carriger

324. “I’d rather be loyal than right.”

— Gail Carriger

325. “Perched in one corner, like some sort of ship’s figurehead, was an oddly sinister wicker chicken. It frowned down upon her with an air of chubby disdain.”

— Gail Carriger

326. “Frankly, Percy was accustomed to offending people into near murderous rages. When someone actually tried to pot him off, it felt endearingly honest.”

— Gail Carriger

327. “I’ll do it,” insisted Arsenic, helping Percy to rise. He supposed a thousand Englishmen around the world cried out that he took aid from a woman, but he was never one to accept lightly the illogicality of custom. Tradition seemed to him a poor excuse for inconvenience. Also he rather enjoyed her fussing over him.”

— Gail Carriger

328. “Alexia abhorred hypocrisy, especially when munitions were involved.”

— Gail Carriger

329. “The important question is, what will your wear for a wedding dress, Alexia? You look horrible in white.”

— Gail Carriger

330. “Oh, dear me, no. Then I should be known as that vampire with all the cats.”

— Gail Carriger

331. “Are you certain they will manage without me?” “We will be back in only a few hours. How bad can it get?” “Don’t tempt fate, my love.”

— Gail Carriger

332. “Alexia had spent long hours wondering over that mustache. Werewolves did not grow hair, as they did not age. Where had it come from? Had he always had it? For how many centuries had his poor abused upper lip labored under the burden of such vegetation?”

— Gail Carriger

333. “Always, there was a tiny part of her that wanted to kill any man she knew. On principle.”

— Gail Carriger

334. “A vampire attacked me last night.” Ivy pretended a faint.”

— Gail Carriger

335. “The greatest unwritten law of the supernatural set was that one simply didn’t steal someone else’s human.”

— Gail Carriger

336. “Classic author moment, “Oh dear, did I kill that character or not?”

— Gail Carriger

337. “Ever since her trip with Alexia to Scotland, Mrs. Tunstell had rather a taste for foreign travel. Alexia blamed it on the kilts.”

— Gail Carriger

338. “As though growing up were something one could do contagiously, caught through associating with officious older sisters.”

— Gail Carriger

339. “Mr Lefoux, would you fetch Prim for me? She seems to have been kilted.” Quesnel.”

— Gail Carriger

340. “At least with men, one always knew where they were located, great yelling, galumphing creatures that they were. She.”

— Gail Carriger

341. “Alexia figured, delightedly, that this meant he did, in fact, tend to traipse around his private apartments in the altogether. Marriage was becoming more and more of an attractive prospect.”

— Gail Carriger

342. “Soap understood her. Soap would always understand.”

— Gail Carriger

343. “Like a proper gentleman, the good captain never made mention of the undergarment murder.”

— Gail Carriger

344. “The other gentleman was Lord Akeldama – an undersized absurdity, all pompadour and no circumstance. He sported a monocle he didn’t need, an accent not his own, and an attitude forever tempting disregard. He was also the deadliest creature Preshea knew.”

— Gail Carriger

345. “Knowing Miss Hisselpenny’s constitution, if the mummy were gruesome enough, dinner might just be revisited.”

— Gail Carriger

346. “Alexia wondered what he thought of her as – a cat perhaps? Cats were not, in her experience, an animal with much soul.”

— Gail Carriger

347. “Lady Maccon wondered if she had ever been so foolish over Lord Maccon. Then she recalled that her affection generally took the form of threats and verbal barbs. She gave herself a pat on the back for avoiding sentimentality.”

— Gail Carriger

348. “Mortals trotted about in shoes and corsets made to limit movement, fashion for prey.”

— Gail Carriger

349. “She’s kind of like an odd, loud, fierce fairy godmother, isn’t she?”

— Gail Carriger

350. “He was still unsure as to how Lyall had, in fact, managed to keep him in London all these days. Betas, in the end, were mysterious creatures with strange powers. Powers that, when all was said and done, seemed to involve nothing more than a continued battery of civilized behavior and an excess of manners. Effective, blast him.”

— Gail Carriger