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Top 300 Craig Ferguson Quotes (2025 Update)
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Craig Ferguson Quote: “They’ve found a link between chemicals in shampoo and obesity. If you’re eating shampoo, your weight is the least of your concerns.”

301. “They’ve found a link between chemicals in shampoo and obesity. If you’re eating shampoo, your weight is the least of your concerns.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I have to do a show which is of interest to me, or else I’m lost.”

302. “I have to do a show which is of interest to me, or else I’m lost.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I know that’s not the right accent, but I can’t do the right accent. It’s either the wrong accent or another Octomom joke.”

303. “I know that’s not the right accent, but I can’t do the right accent. It’s either the wrong accent or another Octomom joke.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “It’s a book. It’s mine. And it’s done.”

304. “It’s a book. It’s mine. And it’s done.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “All they teach you in drama school is how to do stage fights and be a pain in rehearsals.”

305. “All they teach you in drama school is how to do stage fights and be a pain in rehearsals.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I’m hooked on email. That’s right, kids, I’m one of you.”

306. “I’m hooked on email. That’s right, kids, I’m one of you.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “Wait! Don’t applaud my cheapness! I’ve got other crap I need help with!”

307. “Wait! Don’t applaud my cheapness! I’ve got other crap I need help with!”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I had lived in fear of the fabled terrifying visions that assail chronic drinkers, but which had not yet attacked me.”

308. “I had lived in fear of the fabled terrifying visions that assail chronic drinkers, but which had not yet attacked me.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “Democrats in state legislatures are at their lowest level since the 1920s. President Obama has a can’t-miss strategy to save the party in 2016. He’s leaving.”

309. “Democrats in state legislatures are at their lowest level since the 1920s. President Obama has a can’t-miss strategy to save the party in 2016. He’s leaving.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I’ll try anything a hundred times just to make sure I don’t like it.”

310. “I’ll try anything a hundred times just to make sure I don’t like it.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I found out it is just as hard to make a movie that you are not proud of as it is to make one you love.”

311. “I found out it is just as hard to make a movie that you are not proud of as it is to make one you love.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I enjoy bathing, as many Europeans don’t.”

312. “I enjoy bathing, as many Europeans don’t.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “You know who they’re blaming for global warming now? This is true. Fat people.”

313. “You know who they’re blaming for global warming now? This is true. Fat people.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I always suspected the perpetrators of both good and evil probably would have behaved the same way, God or no God.”

314. “I always suspected the perpetrators of both good and evil probably would have behaved the same way, God or no God.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I said that the only way I could have a band that would work in the format of my show is if the band were crap. So if I have a band they’d have to really suck.”

315. “I said that the only way I could have a band that would work in the format of my show is if the band were crap. So if I have a band they’d have to really suck.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “For a while, some schools across the country were banning spelling bees. For obvious reasons, of course – steroids.”

316. “For a while, some schools across the country were banning spelling bees. For obvious reasons, of course – steroids.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I sometimes wonder if fear isn’t just God’s way of saying, ‘Pay attention, this could be fun.”

317. “I sometimes wonder if fear isn’t just God’s way of saying, ‘Pay attention, this could be fun.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “I don’t want my sons to be traumatized by what happened to their father or grandfathers or great-grandfathers, but everyone should know about the lives of those who came before them so that they can figure out why their fingers are bent or why sometimes they feel bone-crushingly sad for no reason that anyone else can see.”

318. “I don’t want my sons to be traumatized by what happened to their father or grandfathers or great-grandfathers, but everyone should know about the lives of those who came before them so that they can figure out why their fingers are bent or why sometimes they feel bone-crushingly sad for no reason that anyone else can see.”

— Craig Ferguson

Craig Ferguson Quote: “My own belief is that two adults are allowed to love who they want, and if you don’t agree with that, you are a narrow-minded shitfuck and we can’t be friends.”

319. “My own belief is that two adults are allowed to love who they want, and if you don’t agree with that, you are a narrow-minded shitfuck and we can’t be friends.”

— Craig Ferguson

Sarcastic Quotes

Sarcastic Quotes

Quotes About Stories

Quotes About Stories

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Sarcastic Quotes

Sarcastic Quotes

Quotes About Stories

Quotes About Stories

Veteran's Day Quotes

Veteran's Day Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Motivational Quotes

INSPIRATIONAL SUCCESS MOTIVATIONAL

Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

Inspirational Entrepreneurship Quotes

ENTREPRENEURSHIP BUSINESS INSPIRATIONAL

Positive Quotes

Positive Quotes

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