Top 400 Douglas Adams Quotes (2025 Update)
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151. “I can see we’re in for a fabulous evening’s apocalypse.”

— Douglas Adams

152. “Being offended by things is the world’s big hobby at the moment. It’s almost taken over from wearing goatee beards.”

— Douglas Adams

153. “There’s always a moment when you start to fall out of love, whether it’s with a person or an idea or a cause, even if it’s one you only narrate to yourself years after the event: a tiny thing, a wrong word, a false note, which means that things can never be quite the same again.”

— Douglas Adams

154. “Zaphod did not want to tangle with them and, deciding that just as discretion is the better part of valor, so was cowardice is the better part of discretion, he valiantly hid himself in a closet.”

— Douglas Adams

155. “Now the world has gone to bed, Darkness won’t engulf my head, I can see by infrared, How I hate the night. Now I lay me down to sleep, Try to count electric sheep, Sweet dream wishes you can keep, How I hate the night. -Marvin.”

— Douglas Adams

156. “I always thought something was fundamentally wrong with the universe.”

— Douglas Adams

157. “The story goes that I first had the idea for The Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy while lying drunk in a field in Innsbruck.”

— Douglas Adams

158. “My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre and that I am therefore excused from saving universes.”

— Douglas Adams

159. “If God allows proof that he exists he robs people of faith and without faith what is God? Nothing.”

— Douglas Adams

160. “Everybody has their moment of great opportunity in life. If you happen to miss the one you care about, then everything else becomes eerily easy.”

— Douglas Adams

161. “Why should I want to make anything up? Life’s bad enough as it is without wanting to invent any more of it.”

— Douglas Adams

162. “Let us be dreamers, thinkers, speculative philosophers, or as our spouses would have it: Idiots.”

— Douglas Adams

163. “The fact is, I don’t know where my ideas come from. Nor does any writer. The only real answer is to drink way too much coffee and buy yourself a desk that doesn’t collapse when you beat your head against it.”

— Douglas Adams

164. “There is an art to the business of making sandwiches which it is given to few ever to find the time to explore in depth. It is a simple task, but the opportunities for satisfaction are many and profound.”

— Douglas Adams

165. “Some say that the universe is made so that when we are about to understand it it changes into something even more incomprehensible. And then there are those who say that this has already happened.”

— Douglas Adams

166. “And then, just when you think that you have experienced all the wonders that this world has to offer, you round a peak and suddenly think you’re doing the whole thing over again, but this time on drugs.”

— Douglas Adams

167. “There is another theory that states: This has already happened...”

— Douglas Adams

168. “There are some people you like immediately, some whom you think you might learn to like in the fullness of time, and some that you simply want to push away from you with a sharp stick.”

— Douglas Adams

169. “The Universe, as has been observed before, is an unsettlingly big place, a fact which for the sake of a quiet life most people tend to ignore.”

— Douglas Adams

170. “We live in strange times. We also live in strange places, each in a universe of our own. The people with whom we populate our universe are the shadows of whole other universes intersecting with our own.”

— Douglas Adams

171. “Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow pizza.”

— Douglas Adams

172. “If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.”

— Douglas Adams

173. “There is a feeling which persists in England that making a sandwich interesting, attractive, or in any way pleasant to eat is something sinful that only foreigners do.”

— Douglas Adams

174. “Time is the worst place, so to speak, to get lost in, as Arthur Dent could testify, having been lost in both time and space a good deal. At least being lost in space kept you busy.”

— Douglas Adams

175. “Arthur blinked at the screens and felt he was missing something important. Suddenly he realized what it was. “Is there any tea on this spaceship?” he asked.”

— Douglas Adams

176. “Nobody got murdered before lunch. But nobody. People weren’t up to it. You needed a good lunch to get both the blood-sugar and blood-lust levels up.”

— Douglas Adams

177. “I’m up to here with cool, okay? I am so amazingly cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis.”

— Douglas Adams

178. “If there’s any real truth, it’s that the entire multidimensional infinity of the Universe is almost certainly being run by a bunch of maniacs.”

— Douglas Adams

179. “What does it matter? Science has achieved some wonderful things, of course, but I’d far rather be happy than right any day.”

— Douglas Adams

180. “My universe is my eyes and my ears. Anything else is hearsay.”

— Douglas Adams

181. “What god would be hanging around Terminal Two of Heathrow Airport trying to catch the 15:37 flight to Oslo?”

— Douglas Adams

182. “One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about humans was their habit of continually stating and repeating the very very obvious.”

— Douglas Adams

183. “And so the problem remained; lots of people were mean, and most were miserable, even the ones with digital watches.”

— Douglas Adams

184. “Very deep. You should send that in to the Reader’s Digest. They’ve got a page for people like you.”

— Douglas Adams

185. “In the old days, writers used to sit in front of a typewriter and stare out of the window. Nowadays, because of the marvels of convergent technology, the thing you type on and the window you stare out of are now the same thing.”

— Douglas Adams

186. “There is no problem so complicated that you can’t find a very simple answer to it if you look at it right.”

— Douglas Adams

187. “Time doesn’t necessarily happen in chronological order.”

— Douglas Adams

188. “First we thought the PC was a calculator. Then we found out how to turn numbers into letters with ASCII – and we thought it was a typewriter. Then we discovered graphics, and we thought it was a television. With the World Wide Web, we’ve realized it’s a brochure.”

— Douglas Adams

189. “Assumptions are what we don’t know we are making.”

— Douglas Adams

190. “Yes, it is true that sometimes unusually intelligent and sensitive children can appear to be stupid. But stupid children can sometimes appear to be stupid as well. I think that’s something you might have to consider.”

— Douglas Adams

191. “I am a private detective. I am paid to be inquisitive and presumptuous.”

— Douglas Adams

192. “The complexities of cause and effect defy analysis.”

— Douglas Adams

193. “It is folly to say you know what is happening to other people. Only they know, if they exist. They have their own Universes of their own eyes and ears.”

— Douglas Adams

194. “Alone of all the races on earth, they seem to be free from the ‘Grass is Greener on the other side of the fence’ syndrome, and roundly proclaim that Australia is, in fact, the other side of that fence.”

— Douglas Adams

195. “The idea that Bill Gates has appeared like a knight in shining armor to lead all customers out of a mire of technological chaos neatly ignores the fact that it was he who, by peddling second-rate technology, led them into it in the first place.”

— Douglas Adams

196. “I think the idea of art kills creativity.”

— Douglas Adams

197. “A nerd is someone who uses a telephone to talk to other people about telephones.”

— Douglas Adams

198. “The teacher usually learns more than the pupils. Isn’t that true? “It would be hard to learn much less than my pupils,” came a low growl from somewhere on the table, “without undergoing a pre-frontal lobotomy.””

— Douglas Adams

199. “And all dared to brave unknown terrors, to do mighty deeds, to boldly split infinitives that no man had split before – and thus was the Empire forged.”

— Douglas Adams

200. “My absolute favourite piece of information is the fact that young sloths are so inept that they frequently grab their own arms and legs instead of tree limbs, and fall out of trees.”

— Douglas Adams