Top 300 Jenny Lawson Quotes (2024 Update)
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301. “We are broken. We are healing. It never ends. And, if you look at it in just the right light, it is beautiful.”

— Jenny Lawson

302. “I don’t remember how to feel like I did before. I know it will pass. I remind myself it will pass. It’s like reminding myself that I don’t need to breathe when I’m underwater. My body doesn’t believe it. My head doesn’t either. But my past says it will pass. And my past has never lied the way depression lies to me, so I take a deep breath and keep moving forward, even though I’ve forgotten where I was going.”

— Jenny Lawson

303. “Truthfully though, there are some advantages to being on antipsychotics. This might seem silly but when you go to the pharmacy and you’re standing in line with twenty germy people sneezing all over the place you can honestly say, “Would you mind if I went first? I have to pick up my antipsychotic meds and I REALLY needed them yesterday.” This tactic also works for grocery lines, the DMV, and some buffets.”

— Jenny Lawson

304. “No one ever died from being sad.” Except that they do. And when we see celebrities who fall victim to depression’s lies we think to ourselves, “How in the world could they have killed themselves? They had everything.” But they didn’t. They didn’t have a cure for an illness that convinced them they were better off dead.”

— Jenny Lawson

305. “Rory the Dead Raccoon stood up on his hind legs, his arms stretched out in glee. He looked like he was the most excited member of your surprise party, or like a Time Lord in the process of regenerating. His.”

— Jenny Lawson

306. “It might be all in my head, but that’s where I keep all my crazy, so that makes sense.”

— Jenny Lawson

307. “Whenever something truly mortifying happens, you have a choice. You can let it haunt you for the rest of your life or you can celebrate it, as today’s awkward moment is tomorrow’s fantastic story.”

— Jenny Lawson

308. “Becoming your own friend means taking care of yourself the way you would someone that you love. And that’s hard. But it is necessary.”

— Jenny Lawson

309. “It steals away the very essence of you and leaves terrible lies in its place. It takes the logic that is true and twists it so that you can’t see things that are rational and real. That depression lies to you. You recognize these lies when you are sane or stable or balanced, but when you are in the depths of a depression they seem real. When I’m in that hole I remind myself that my brain is lying and that I’ll realize that fully when I recover. And I do.”

— Jenny Lawson

310. “We are all made up from the weirdness that we try to hide from the rest of the world.”

— Jenny Lawson

311. “In some ways it’s a relief to feel the pain of coming rains. It assures me that the storms in my head are real too. And that they will, as well, pass in time. I wonder if there’s a weather pattern for depression. A barometric pressure for anxiety. A bad wind for sleeplessness and fear. I wonder why I’m so much rain in bones and fog in thought.”

— Jenny Lawson

312. “Really, the only people you should be comparing yourself to would be people who make you feel better by comparison. For instance, people who are in comas, because those people have no spoons at all and you don’t see anyone judging them. Personally, I always compare myself to Galileo because everyone knows he’s fantastic, but he has no spoons at all because he’s dead. So technically I’m better than Galileo because all I’ve done is take a shower and already I’ve accomplished more than him today.”

— Jenny Lawson

313. “It’s the whole world. It’s every terrible thing that happens in the universe that I feel like I need to speak out about but then don’t because fear stops me. Then I fear that inaction. I fear that my silence is equal to agreement with terrible things. I fear when I do speak out that I’ve done so inelegantly, or wrongly, or that I’ve made things worse. That it’s not my place to speak or that it’s not my place to be silent.”

— Jenny Lawson

314. “I’m not joking, but we still laugh because laughter is the best way to cover pain.”

— Jenny Lawson

315. “You mix a can of cranberry sauce with a can of mandarin oranges and eat it out of a cereal bowl while your family questions your life choices.”

— Jenny Lawson

316. “I live with two extroverts, which is helpful in that they keep me from becoming a complete hermit but also terrible because they have no concept of the utter emotional and physical exhaustion that comes from living in a world that is too peoply.”

— Jenny Lawson

317. “Editor’s note: Start over. Sound less ludicrous.”

— Jenny Lawson

318. “I’m not sure what the difference is between sleeping and time travel.”

— Jenny Lawson

319. “Life is full of these moments that are supposed to be amazing but end up being questionable at best. I often wonder if it’s because we build them up as being so important and so they can never measure up. I think that’s part of it, but honestly I suspect that the people who made up all the milestones that are supposed to be important are psychopaths.”

— Jenny Lawson

320. “Bruce Springsteen said you can’t start a fire without a spark, but you can start it with a magnifying glass. It ruins the rhyme scheme but at the cost of science. And arson. But maybe it’s still a spark even if it starts with a magnifying glass? Maybe the first flame is always a spark? But that’s like saying you can’t start a fire without a fire. That’s just sloppy songwriting. Bruce Springsteen is obviously not the boss of scientific accuracy.”

— Jenny Lawson

321. “And sometimes it is small and sometimes it is big, but always it is hard. And always it is worth it.”

— Jenny Lawson

322. “Only monsters call when they could text.”

— Jenny Lawson

323. “Still, my face does feel very clean. Clean and terribly, terribly lonely.”

— Jenny Lawson

324. “I didn’t fail in responding to past treatments... those treatments failed to work for me.”

— Jenny Lawson

325. “I am one of the small group of people who go to Halloween stores not for temporary plastic decorations but for actual interior design ideas.”

— Jenny Lawson

326. “And I have the Internet. That sounds weird, but Twitter is a lot like having a large, invisible gang of equally messed-up people who will hide with you in bathrooms and make you laugh under the pillow fort you’ve built in a lonely hotel room.”

— Jenny Lawson

327. “I have struggled with anxiety for as long as I can remember. When I was young I thought it would pass as I got older, and when I was older I thought it would pass when I was successful, and when I was successful I thought that it was hopeless because even when everything was going right I was still wrong.”

— Jenny Lawson

328. “I remind myself that my eyes are working differently than most people’s right now. Being in the dark too long will do that to you. And sometimes there’s a small blessing in that.”

— Jenny Lawson

329. “I try to be honest about the shame that I feel because with honesty comes empowerment and also understanding.”

— Jenny Lawson

330. “This morning I was writing about brussel sprouts and spellcheck told me they’re actually “brussels sprouts.” With an S. Like they’re from Brussels? Because I’m in my forties and I just now figured that out. My whole life has been a lie.”

— Jenny Lawson

331. “Looking back now, it seems strange that I spent so much of my childhood on alert for roving satanists and unmarked quicksand, neither of which ended up being nearly as much of a problem in my real life as I had been led to believe.”

— Jenny Lawson

332. “I was traumatized, but my vocabulary was improving.”

— Jenny Lawson

333. “When our brains declare war on our very existence.”

— Jenny Lawson

334. “If I had a nickel for every time I hypocritically felt better about myself for not being one of those other hypocritical people who self-righteously brag about being better than other people who aren’t as enlightened as they are, I’d probably have enough money to actually fix some of the things that none of us are really doing anything meaningful about.”

— Jenny Lawson

335. “My anxiety disorder, on the other hand, is always with me and comes with all sorts of niggling “bonus” disorders and phobias, like some sort of terrible boxed set.”

— Jenny Lawson

336. “I am a bad risk,” I said, sighing with acceptance. He was silent for a minute. “You are a bad risk,” he agreed, nodding as he looked up at the stars. “But one I’m happy to take.” And as I breathed in the night air I thought of the struggle and the glory and the sadness and celebration and mystery that still lay ahead of me. And I said, “Me too.” And it was the truth.”

— Jenny Lawson

337. “I have more tools now than ever, and that helps, but sometimes the only thing that I accomplish in a day is just surviving. It’s both an amazing achievement and also tinged with shame, as you see others who seem to whiz past you as you barely tread water. Maybe they’re treading water too. You can’t tell. You’re just trying to breathe.”

— Jenny Lawson

338. “Victor might have refused to congratulate me on the fact that I hadn’t fallen down a well that week, but that dead raccoon always had my back and very few people can say that.”

— Jenny Lawson

339. “How can we be expected to properly judge ourselves? We know all of our worst secrets.”

— Jenny Lawson

340. “I will probably feel my best only after I’ve been dead for 6 months.”

— Jenny Lawson

341. “I can’t even organize my sock drawer, much less a murder.”

— Jenny Lawson

342. “Those terrible things you tell yourself? Can you imagine if the person you love most were telling themselves those things? You’d think they were crazy. And wrong. They think the same about you. Those negative things you are thinking are not rational. Remember that depression lies and that your brain is not always trustworthy.”

— Jenny Lawson

343. “You are killing me. You are shaming me. You are standing in the way of the health and happiness of so many of us. And you are making money while standing on our backs and telling us how much we don’t need the things that keep us alive.”

— Jenny Lawson