Top 500 T.J. Klune Quotes (2025 Update)
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201. “He gave me a lot, but it would have never been enough.” He looks thoughtful as he gazes back down at me. “It would never have been enough,” he tells me,” because it would never have been you.”

— T.J. Klune

202. “But even if you have bad dreams, you must remember that they’re only that. Dreams. You will always wake from them. And they will fade, eventually. I’ve found that waking from a bad dream brings a sense of relief unlike anything else in the world. It means what you were seeing wasn’t real.”

— T.J. Klune

203. “He bent his head down, running his nose along my cheek. My neck. Behind my ear, huffing his scent onto me like he hadn’t done since he’d become the Alpha. I loved it. And him. But.”

— T.J. Klune

204. “This is for life. When the wolf attaches, it is for life.” “I.”

— T.J. Klune

205. “Oh boy,” the unicorn said. “You do that, Robert Smith.” I frowned at him. “Who?” The unicorn shook his head. “This guy I knew. Crazy hair. Sad all the time. Used to sing about it. It got old real fast. Before your time.” Whatever. It was probably stupid old people music, anyway.”

— T.J. Klune

206. “Oh, Sam. Sam, Sam, Sam. You know nothing about dragons, do you? Wow. How the hell are we your destiny? You poor, poor sexy man-child. I feel bad for you. And slightly aroused. But mostly bad. And aroused.”

— T.J. Klune

207. “We are literally the gayest pack that has ever existed,” Rico said to no one in particular. “I see no problem with this.”

— T.J. Klune

208. “Robert Redford is like cheese: he ages well and I want to put him in my mouth.”

— T.J. Klune

209. “I am evil incarnate,” the dastardly voice said. “I am the blight upon the skin of this world. And I will bring it to its knees. Prepare for the End of Days! Your time has come, and the rivers will run with the blood of the innocents!” Talia sighed. “He’s such a drama queen.”

— T.J. Klune

210. “You spit your drink over the balcony. It landed on someone. That means you have to marry them. It’s tradition.”

— T.J. Klune

211. “It’s like something so lovely can’t just be lovely. It also has to be harsh and corroding.”

— T.J. Klune

212. “If the inspirational calendar had been a person, Gus would have punched it in the face.”

— T.J. Klune

213. “The color of your dress really brings out the extraordinary paleness of your skin tone. Are you unwell? Dying, perhaps?”

— T.J. Klune

214. “Everyone’s different, Wallace. There’s no one way to go about this, no uniform rules in place that can be applied to every single person like you who comes through my doors. That wouldn’t make sense because you’re not like everyone else, just as they’re not you.”

— T.J. Klune

215. “Life isn’t defined by how long it is. It’s the moments you have while you’re alive.”

— T.J. Klune

216. “Why’d the chicken cross the road?” I gaped at him. “Because it got scared after it saw me kicking your ass!”

— T.J. Klune

217. “If we worry about the little things all the time, we run the risk of missing the bigger things.”

— T.J. Klune

218. “He put his finger guns away. He should not be allowed to carry weapons of mass humiliation.”

— T.J. Klune

219. “Can you sign something?” Nicole demanded. “This paper? This napkin? My chest? My inner thighs or my wildest dreams? Whatever you want.”

— T.J. Klune

220. “Dates usually meant expectations. And expectations led to situations that Josy wasn’t comfortable with. It was easier to just avoid it entirely.”

— T.J. Klune

221. “Someone, my mother had said. Make someone very happy. Not a her. But someone. I.”

— T.J. Klune

222. “Gus screamed, the notecards falling out of his hand as he jumped. “Whoa,” Bernice said. “That certainly was high-pitched for a man.” “Gus is special that way,” Betty said as she scooped up the cards off the counter.”

— T.J. Klune

223. “Most people like hair,” Morgan said. “His is curly and dreamy. Now shut up.”

— T.J. Klune

224. “Change starts with the voices of the few. I will be one of those few because they taught me how. And I know that I’m not alone.”

— T.J. Klune

225. “Another fairy flew up, carrying a spear and wearing a helmet and not much else. I thought about asking why he had armor on his head and not his balls, but I didn’t think that was proper etiquette while being held prisoner by the Dark Woods fairies.”

— T.J. Klune

226. “There are moments in your life, moments when chances have to be taken. It’s scary because there is always the possibility of failure. I know that. I know that. Because once upon a time, I took a chance on a man that I had failed before. I was scared. I was terrified. I thought I might lose everything. But I wasn’t living, then. The life I had before wasn’t living. It was getting by. And I will never regret the chances I took.”

— T.J. Klune

227. “I know. But I like you even more when I’m sober.” “Boom,” Bernice moaned. “Right in the feels.”

— T.J. Klune

228. “I was going to be the best friend Jeremy ever had, even if it meant death by blue balls.”

— T.J. Klune

229. “I’m going to have to work out even more now tomorrow to make up for all the potatoes and bread. Okay. I feel bad. That was a lie. I’m not going to work out at all. That sounds just awful.”

— T.J. Klune

230. “There was the danger with knowing and loving others. You always knew things about them to throw back in their faces.”

— T.J. Klune

231. “The first time you share tea, you are a stranger,” Mei said. “The second time you share tea,” Nelson said, “you are an honored guest.” Hugo nodded. “And the third time you share tea, you become family. It’s a Balti quote.”

— T.J. Klune

232. “It helps to laugh, even when you don’t feel like laughing. You can’t be sad when you’re laughing. Mostly.”

— T.J. Klune

233. “THREE YEARS. One month. Twenty-six days.”

— T.J. Klune

234. “Because a life lived is a life worth remembering, no matter how long or short it may be.”

— T.J. Klune

235. “I’d always heard that your twenties were for partying until all hours of the night, and then your thirties were pajamas at eight. I couldn’t wait until I turned thirty because I was already there in spirit.”

— T.J. Klune

236. “Have you kissed a guy yet?” I blushed. “No.” Before.”

— T.J. Klune

237. “Joe sang the loudest of all. He said, you belong to me.”

— T.J. Klune

238. “Bear? What am I?” I sigh. “My brother.” He cocks an eyebrow. “My big brother.” “Damn right. And what do my parents have in abundance?” “A tolerance for someone like you?” He glares at me. I sigh again. “Disposable income.” “And who just made a big speech about family and love and other gay things?” Goddammit. “Me.”

— T.J. Klune

239. “Gus hated feeling anxious. He also hated warm ketchup, loud people, sunburns, parallel parking, jams and jellies, Instagram, Sarah McLachlan’s SPCA commercials, rubber glue, Michael Bay’s DVD commentaries, Michael Bay’s films, Michael Bay, and that weird feeling that tattooed, bearded hipster caused in the pit of his stomach that felt like he had tripped down a flight of stairs into a frozen lake that got lit on fire.”

— T.J. Klune

240. “I could appreciate the older man. I had eyes, after all. He was all tall and barrel-chested and rocked a mustache that curled at the ends. Gary and I agreed he was a total KILF.”

— T.J. Klune

241. “Good tea is patience. It’s not about instant gratification, not like the bags with the little strings. Those can be fleeting, here and gone again before you know it. Tea like this makes you appreciate the effort you put into it. The more it steeps, the stronger the taste.”

— T.J. Klune

242. “Life, Linus Baker knew, came down to what we made from it. It was about the choices, both big and small.”

— T.J. Klune

243. “I couldn’t even begin to guess how old he was. Maybe thirty. Or three hundred. When you’re eleven, anyone older is just old.”

— T.J. Klune

244. “Ryan shrugged. “You’re adorable. With your angry glitter.” And Gary blushed. His whole face. Never before in the strange and sordid history of our super-best friendship had I ever seen him blush.”

— T.J. Klune

245. “You’re too precious to put into words. I think... it’s like one of Theodore’s buttons. If you asked him why he cared about them so, he would tell you it’s because they exist at all.”

— T.J. Klune

246. “What’re a couple of years in the face of eternity?”

— T.J. Klune

247. “Life is all about chances. It’s all about these little moments that add up to greatness. And there are times when you have to grab greatness by the balls and say, ‘Hey! Greatness! I’ve got your nuts and you can’t do a single godsdamn thing about it!”

— T.J. Klune

248. “Sam’s just dealing with some issues. He recently came to the realization that he’s a twenty-year-old virgin prude.”

— T.J. Klune

249. “I’m about to hug the crap out of you,” I warned him. “Like, full-on feelings hug where it goes on for a bit too long and becomes slightly awkward and we both clear our throats and shuffle our feet when it’s over.”

— T.J. Klune

250. “Being gay is so hard,” he muttered. “Not only do you have to admit that, but then you have to find out what kind of gay you are. It’s all very confusing. It was so much easier when we played with Legos instead of dressing like leather cubs and pedo-bait.”

— T.J. Klune