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Top 100 Billy Connolly Quotes (2025 Update)
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Billy Connolly Quote: “Don’t work out, work in.”

101. “Don’t work out, work in.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo.”

102. “My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “I hate those earnest TV documentaries that are the world according to people with glasses who know better than you.”

103. “I hate those earnest TV documentaries that are the world according to people with glasses who know better than you.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “Now the country is in a terrible state and you’ve blamed it on a number of things – unemployment rate, the value of the pound, and all that. It’s actually because the national anthem is boring.”

104. “Now the country is in a terrible state and you’ve blamed it on a number of things – unemployment rate, the value of the pound, and all that. It’s actually because the national anthem is boring.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “Whenever I wear something expensive it looks stolen.”

105. “Whenever I wear something expensive it looks stolen.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “I loathe hecklers. I haven’t got a good syllable to say. When you come out of the club circuit and into the concert hall, they should be gone. There’s an element of manners that should tell you that the ticket is dear and it’s a different venue.”

106. “I loathe hecklers. I haven’t got a good syllable to say. When you come out of the club circuit and into the concert hall, they should be gone. There’s an element of manners that should tell you that the ticket is dear and it’s a different venue.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “There’s nothing better than a fight, especially when you’re watching it from a safe place. You can yell encouragement! Hit him with the left, he’s a big Jessie!”

107. “There’s nothing better than a fight, especially when you’re watching it from a safe place. You can yell encouragement! Hit him with the left, he’s a big Jessie!”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “I set out to be a cross between Lenny Bruce and Robert the Bruce.”

108. “I set out to be a cross between Lenny Bruce and Robert the Bruce.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “Try to catch a trout and experience the glorious feeling of letting it go and seeing it swimming away.”

109. “Try to catch a trout and experience the glorious feeling of letting it go and seeing it swimming away.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “I still do my comedy and my performance stuff and my acting so it’s not all-consuming. But I do find myself drawing more and more these days.”

110. “I still do my comedy and my performance stuff and my acting so it’s not all-consuming. But I do find myself drawing more and more these days.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “People die all the time. It’s just that you’re not around.”

111. “People die all the time. It’s just that you’re not around.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “For me, it’s about the desire to win. My audience becomes a crowd of wild animals and I have to be the lion-tamer or be eaten.”

112. “For me, it’s about the desire to win. My audience becomes a crowd of wild animals and I have to be the lion-tamer or be eaten.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “My stories are not story shaped, they’re me shaped.”

113. “My stories are not story shaped, they’re me shaped.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “Blessed are those who yodel – for they shall never be troubled by offers of work.”

114. “Blessed are those who yodel – for they shall never be troubled by offers of work.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “I hope I’ve shown a few disbelievers that they should never discount those they think are different, disorganised or distractible.”

115. “I hope I’ve shown a few disbelievers that they should never discount those they think are different, disorganised or distractible.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “Sometimes there’s a tackiness about Route 66 that out-tacks any tackiness I’ve ever seen anywhere else. And the Meramec Caverns are the pinnacle of that tack.”

116. “Sometimes there’s a tackiness about Route 66 that out-tacks any tackiness I’ve ever seen anywhere else. And the Meramec Caverns are the pinnacle of that tack.”

— Billy Connolly

Billy Connolly Quote: “I don’t believe in angels, no. But I do have a wee parking angel. It’s on my dashboard and you wind it up. The wings flap and it’s supposed to give you a parking space. It’s worked so far.”

117. “I don’t believe in angels, no. But I do have a wee parking angel. It’s on my dashboard and you wind it up. The wings flap and it’s supposed to give you a parking space. It’s worked so far.”

— Billy Connolly

Hilarious Quotes

Hilarious Quotes

Being Happy Quotes

Being Happy Quotes

Demotivational Quotes

Demotivational Quotes

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Hilarious Quotes

Hilarious Quotes

Being Happy Quotes

Being Happy Quotes

Demotivational Quotes

Demotivational Quotes

Funny Motivational Quotes

Funny Motivational Quotes

Funny Senior Quotes

Funny Senior Quotes

Funny Thursday Quotes

Funny Thursday Quotes

Funny Monday Quotes

Funny Monday Quotes

Funny Tuesday Quotes

Funny Tuesday Quotes

Rainy Day Quotes

Rainy Day Quotes

Motivational Quotes

Motivational Quotes

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