Top 100

Top 200 Chris Rock Quotes (2024 Update)
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Chris Rock Quote: “I don’t get high, but sometimes I wish I did. That way, when I messed up in life I would have an excuse. But right now there’s no rehab for stupidity.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I had always been – everybody kind of likes comedy. I was very interested in comedy, beyond just liking it. I had friends that took apart radios; I wanted to take apart jokes.”
Chris Rock Quote: “When people try to read between the lines – critics, they have a job. Their job is to make something bigger than it is.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Gas is getting so expensive I’m gonna ride a mexican to work.”
Chris Rock Quote: “If a woman tells you she’s twenty and looks sixteen, she’s twelve. If she tells you she’s twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she’s damn near fourty.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.”
Chris Rock Quote: “You know, you get famous and you work in these weird jobs and you don’t have a lot in common with people. But once you have kids, you have everything in common with everybody.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I see guys who can’t make 10 percent of what I make, and yet they have four Bentleys, three houses, and four bodyguards.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Babies don’t know who’s rich and who’s poor. You love ’em and they’re happy.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Though part of me had always wanted to be a comedian, another part of me had always wanted to be Bryant Gumbel or Dan Rather.”
Chris Rock Quote: “People are always going to, you know, find something wrong with people who are not the exact same as them. That’s just what it is. Black, white, short, tall, religions, whatever. People are bad.”
Chris Rock Quote: “There’s a difference between racism and “I don’t know any better. I’m clueless.” Racism is like, “I’m trying to make you feel bad.” That’s racism.”
Chris Rock Quote: “My dad worked every day. I didn’t get into show business to work every day. So the fact that most days I get to like, spend really good time with my kids – that’s what success is to me.”
Chris Rock Quote: “The best part is just having a partner. There is no real worst part. I’m not going to say there’s a worst part. I mean I’m a comedian – comedians like to work alone. So maybe I’m not the ideal guy to be married to, in that sense.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Comedians tend to find a comfort zone and stay there and do lamer versions of themselves for the rest of their career.”
Chris Rock Quote: “If you’re the president you only have two jobs: peace and money.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I think it’s better to have ideas.”
Chris Rock Quote: “You can’t fake comedy – it’s not like a movie, where a director can just cast a pretty face.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I like talking about subjects that aren’t funny in the first place and making them funny. So anything down and depressing is something I’ll talk about.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Hollywood’s just not funny.”
Chris Rock Quote: “A comedian has to live in his head. All this comedy comes from a lonely place. When you’re surrounded by an entourage, you’re not living in your head.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Before I was a comedian, I thought the coolest thing that would happen to me was to be a teenager. Boy, was I wrong.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I’m like the Hulk on stage. It’s way over the top. That’s Bizarro Chris. Sometimes I get off stage and go What did I say?! I’ll watch one of my stand-up specials a year later and go Eww, that was mean.”
Chris Rock Quote: “A white boy that makes C’s in college can make it to the White House.”
Chris Rock Quote: “You want to track Hollywood careers, look in the real estate section. You see a guy buy a house that costs $6 million, and you can literally start counting the days until he starts doing crappy movies.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I love seeing black people do normal things, being judged as normal people.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Right now, my job is that I’m like an ambulance chaser. I’ve got to look for movies with white guys falling out of them.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I was bused to a school in Gerritsen Beach in Brooklyn in 1972. I was one of the first black kids in the history of the school.”
Chris Rock Quote: “There’s not one reference in that thing that doesn’t play. People deal with emotions in music all the time, but comedians are always talking about what they see. But we seldom talk about what we feel.”
Chris Rock Quote: “You just got to be really logical when you’re a comedian – to a fault. Like a lawyer’s got to believe in the law.”
Chris Rock Quote: “An entertainer’s reputation as a live act is the most valuable thing he or she can have. If people know you give good shows, you’ll never be broke for the rest of your life.”
Chris Rock Quote: “When a musical act performs, the black audience goes crazy for all the stuff, the album cuts, everything. White audiences, they’re nice and all, but they’re not going to lose it until they get the hits. Comedy is the same thing.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Emotional affairs, those are the only real affairs; those are the real ones.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I can see the humor in just about any situation. After I lost my dad, I realized that none of us should take things too seriously, because everything except death works itself out.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Kennedy didn’t beat Nixon. Satire beat Nixon.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I’m never proper or careful, but I never curse in front of my mother, either.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I mean no disrespect to anything I did before.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Now that I have children, I realize taking care of my children is more fun than anything in the whole world.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Dude, I didn’t say Jude Law can’t act. I didn’t say Jude Law was in bad movies. I just said he’s in every movie.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Bill Cosby was the first comedian I was exposed to, because he doesn’t curse.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Movies have takes. But plays are like life – you don’t really get takes.”
Chris Rock Quote: “My movies are okay, but they’re not my specials.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I want my name to be a brand in comedy. I hope my name stands for comedic excellence.”
Chris Rock Quote: “Just to be clear, Ray Rice was not fired for beating his wife. He was fired because a video of him beating his wife was released.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I’m a rap comedian the same way Bill Cosby is a jazz comedian, Cosby’s laid back. I’m like, bang, bang bang, right into it.”
Chris Rock Quote: “For the most part, comedy is the only fair part of show business.”
Chris Rock Quote: “No film critic’s going to say it, but ‘Madagascar 3’ is better than ‘The Artist.’”
Chris Rock Quote: “There’s always a moment in any stand-up show I do where people are booing. They kinda boo a premise. And then I bail myself out with a joke. But it’s like trying to do movies where there’s a dramatic undertone.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I want to really take chances. I want to be funny in a lot of different ways. I’d like to be great. I want to reach for greatness.”
Chris Rock Quote: “I’ll probably pay more attention to the musicians in the pit than the stars because they’re the closest you’re going to get to normal people in the audience.”
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Bullying Quotes
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