Top 500 Ilona Andrews Quotes (2026 Update)
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451. “Seducing him in the tub smelling of vinegar was out of the question. There had to be some boundaries.”

— Ilona Andrews

452. “Let’s play who can be a better killer. My sword and I love this game.”

— Ilona Andrews

453. “Curran, please don’t bite his head off.” “Why?” “Because it’s illegal. Technically you assaulted him first when you threw him across the lawn.” “I didn’t throw him very far.” I rolled my eyes. “I could’ve thrown him straight up and let him land on the pavement.” “That would also be illegal.” “You keep bringing this ‘illegal’ thing up as if it means something to me.”

— Ilona Andrews

454. “They say the dead have no memories and know no pain.” George’s voice was barely above a whisper, but somehow it was louder than the pleas of the corpses. “It’s not that way for me.”

— Ilona Andrews

455. “The kind of eyes that jumped from a woman’s dreams right into her morning and made trouble in the marriage bed.”

— Ilona Andrews

456. “If I came with you, I’d have to answer uncomfortable questions. I ask questions, I don’t answer them.” “What kind of questions?” “Why were you in a vehicle with Kate, alone? What were you wearing? What was she wearing? How long were you there? Did you do something or did you talk? What was the nature of your discussion? Could this trip have been avoided?”

— Ilona Andrews

457. “Sentient beings are spectacular liars. We are gifted with an unparalleled ability to deny things that make our life unpleasant. We even pretend death isn’t a certainty, because contemplating our own mortality drives us mad.”

— Ilona Andrews

458. “I don’t want it to be attributed to a loss of control on my part. When I throw you out of the window, I want there to be no doubt the act was deliberate.”

— Ilona Andrews

459. “Maybe I should drive,” Troy said. “She knows what she’s doing,” Mad Rogan said. I sniffed. “What?” “The fragrance of a genuine compliment from Mad Rogan. So rare and sweet.”

— Ilona Andrews

460. “Should I bring my own chains this time? Or do you have bigger plans, and this is some sort of freaky murder foreplay” – why did the word foreplay just come out of my mouth? – “and I’ll end up cut up into small pieces inside some freezer at the end? I can just spray myself with mace and shoot myself in the head now and save you the trouble.”

— Ilona Andrews

461. “It’s funny how loud horrified silence can be. Curran laughed.”

— Ilona Andrews

462. “I had been hugged by a giant, superintelligent, pacifist bear. I could do this. I could do anything.”

— Ilona Andrews

463. “Why could nothing with Kate be simple? Why couldn’t Jim ever just come by to tell me that he had bowled a perfect game or benched a personal best. Maybe finally asked that weird tiger girl out.”

— Ilona Andrews

464. “Tall, with skin the color of rich coffee, and dressed all in black, Jim looked like he was carved from a block of solid muscle. Logic said that at some point he must’ve been a baby and then a child, but looking at him one was almost convinced that some deity touched the ground with its scepter and proclaimed, “There shall be a badass,” and Jim sprung into existence, fully formed, complete with clothes, and ready for action.”

— Ilona Andrews

465. “First, it took both of us to kill that thing, and if it reinvents itself again, it will take both of us again. I’m not leaving you alone with it. Second, if you try to physically carry me to the car, I will resist and bleed more. Third, you can possibly stuff me in the car against my will, but you can’t make me drive.” He snarled. “Argh! Why don’t you ever do anything I ask you to?” “Because you don’t ask. You tell me.” We glared at each other.”

— Ilona Andrews

466. “Being human in our world is synonymous with being included into the framework of society.”

— Ilona Andrews

467. “How is it that I could run into a gunfight against overwhelming odds and put myself between bullets and civilians, but I couldn’t scrape together enough courage to speak to the one person who mattered the most to me?”

— Ilona Andrews

468. “Superstitions add texture to life.”

— Ilona Andrews

469. “And you’re not hurt? Nothing’s broken?” “No.” “Oh good.” Mad Rogan sank a vicious punch into Adam’s jaw. Adam fell to his knees, his mouth bloody. “How about now, Adam? Anything hurt now?”

— Ilona Andrews

470. “On a scale from one to ten, the Pack was eleven and everything else a one.”

— Ilona Andrews

471. “Thank you,” I said to Linus. “Of course. This is what I’m here for. It’s my function as your witness.” He grinned again. “Besides, things around you have a way of turning interesting. I do hate to be bored.”

— Ilona Andrews

472. “People do horrible things in the name of keeping things just the way they are.” “Where.”

— Ilona Andrews

473. “He groaned and I saw his face. “Curran!” I would’ve preferred a homicidal lunatic. Oh, wait...”

— Ilona Andrews

474. “He focused on me completely, the same way he did when he asked me a question and waited for an answer. It was almost impossible to look away. If he ever fell in love – which probably wasn’t possible, given that he was likely a psychopath – his would be the kind of devotion people fantasized about.”

— Ilona Andrews

475. “Those we love know us the best. They know all the right places to strike.”

— Ilona Andrews

476. “The thing is, people have a remarkable potential to injure you, but they also have a great power to help you heal.”

— Ilona Andrews

477. “And the next time you choose to project into my dreams, do keep your clothes on.” He smiled. It was a very male, self-aware smile, not just sexual but carnal. The predatory look in his eyes turned ravaging. I felt the need to grab a napkin and hold it in front of me like a shield. “I can project, but I would have to be next to you to do it.” Oh crap.”

— Ilona Andrews

478. “How is it that Raphael made more holes in you than in swiss cheese, but your assholeness survived?” “Raphael doesn’t have a knife big enough to kill my assholeness.”

— Ilona Andrews

479. “Knocking, it’s a thing,” I told him. “You make a fist, lift it, and gently hit the door to let the person inside know you are out there.”

— Ilona Andrews

480. “Jesu, Helen, turn the horses!”

— Ilona Andrews

481. “I picked up the phone and dialed Andrea’s extension. “Yes?” “He glued the chair to my ass.” Silence.”

— Ilona Andrews

482. “The Order of Merciful Aid provided merciful aid, usually on the edge of a blade or the burn of a bullet.”

— Ilona Andrews

483. “The beasties dashed left, rounded the corner, and stopped before a square foot-wide vent secured by a metal grate. “Use the small tooth,” Cornelius intoned. “Open the burrow.” “I’m in a Disney movie,” Augustine said, his face disgusted.”

— Ilona Andrews

484. “If we agree to your proposal, you’ll expect us to abide by your contract, which may require us to compromise our ethics.”

— Ilona Andrews

485. “Great, now I’ve turned into a manga character who repeated everything everyone said.”

— Ilona Andrews

486. “Prime or no Prime, five-year-old girls were scary. I babysat my sisters when they were that age. It still gave me nightmares.”

— Ilona Andrews

487. “Getting a lecture on restraint from the woman who threw a hissy fit and blew up Babylon.”

— Ilona Andrews

488. “How did it feel, Herald?” The memory of power ripping from her in a torrent surfaced in her mind, followed by a spike of pain as she said the power word after her incantation had paved the way. She heard the sound of Adams’ bones breaking and patted Peanut’s nose. “How did it feel?” The Herald of Atlanta smiled. “It felt good.”

— Ilona Andrews

489. “I’m sorry. You should make my life hell for the next hundred years.”

— Ilona Andrews

490. “For example, if a starving man pulls a gun on you and you get the upper hand, you will likely let him go because you will feel sorry for him. That’s the kind of person you are.” “And what kind of person are you?” His face was hard. “The kind who shoots first.”

— Ilona Andrews

491. “Well,” Caldenia said. “Nobody can say that this siege is boring.”

— Ilona Andrews

492. “I wouldn’t be able to do anything with my vampire horde except make it run around in a herd, but it would be a very impressive herd.”

— Ilona Andrews

493. “I tried to picture a female version of Jim and got Jim in a dress instead. The image was disturbing.”

— Ilona Andrews

494. “They dismissed me as a peasant, I dismissed them as shallow, and we were all happy like that.”

— Ilona Andrews

495. “If he ever becomes an issue, I could eat him. He looks delicious.” “Thank you, but that won’t be necessary.” And that wasn’t creepy. Not at all. Caldenia smiled. “You will be surprised how difficult it is to get rid of a human body. I’d say he is perhaps a hundred and seventy pounds? That’s a lot of flesh to manage. We could freeze it. He’d feed me for at least three months.”

— Ilona Andrews

496. “If you prefer, I can acquire a windowless creeper van, and we can huddle in it and eat greasy take out.”

— Ilona Andrews

497. “Do you want the real answer or the one you’re comfortable with?” “I’ll take the truth.”

— Ilona Andrews

498. “Okay,” Juke said. “Your horse is a donkey, your poodle is a giant wolf breed, and your boyfriend is whatever the hell he is. You have problems.”

— Ilona Andrews

499. “It’s not your job to die for your Pack! It’s your job to make the other bastards die for theirs.”

— Ilona Andrews

500. “Does Strawberry Shortcake know you stole her horse? She will be berry, berry angry with you.” I.”

— Ilona Andrews