Top 500 Ilona Andrews Quotes (2026 Update)
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351. “If you hang up on me again, I will slice your car into small pieces and hang them on your roof like Christmas wreaths.”

— Ilona Andrews

352. “Life is trade; we trade our labor for its fruit, we trade hours of study for knowledge, we trade pleasure for pleasure or sometimes for wealth, security, or offspring.”

— Ilona Andrews

353. “She put her hand on her hip. “Where are you going?” “To the boat. You called me Lord Bill again. That means we’re cool.” Cerise slapped her forehead with the heel of her hand and followed him.”

— Ilona Andrews

354. “I batted my eyelashes and did my best to appear dumb as a board.”

— Ilona Andrews

355. “I’m in a Disney movie. – Augustine.”

— Ilona Andrews

356. “Sometimes the Universe smiled. Mostly she kicked me in the face, stomped on my ribs once I fell down, and laughed at my pain, but once in a while she smiled.”

— Ilona Andrews

357. “In the whole world, there was no better place than being wrapped in him.”

— Ilona Andrews

358. “On the other hand it was bad manners to look a gift horse in the mouth. Even if you’re getting it from an overweight cracker in a fringe shirt.”

— Ilona Andrews

359. “What I needed was a big fat clue. A mysterious note laying it all out. A deity popping out of thin air and explaining it to me. Hell, I’d settle for an annoying old lady with a knack for solving mysteries. I actually stopped and waited for a second to see if a clue would fall out of the sky and land at my feet. The Universe declined to oblige.”

— Ilona Andrews

360. “It was Wednesday now. She’d been in town for two days.”

— Ilona Andrews

361. “I’m going to kick you in the head when I get home. Repeatedly.”

— Ilona Andrews

362. “Because you can’t lie, Kate. Everything you think is right there on your face. I’ve met kindergarteners who are better actors than you.”

— Ilona Andrews

363. “He waved his hand, trying to find the right words. “Lord Arland, sometimes it helps to speak plainly.” “Sword,” he said.”

— Ilona Andrews

364. “What are your qualifications for this job?” she asked. “I’m expendable,” I said.”

— Ilona Andrews

365. “Dali elbowed Jim in the ribs. “What he meant to say was he is sorry that duties of his office and his own paranoid nature caused him to overreact.” Jim looked like someone had hit him on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper. “Yes.” “And.”

— Ilona Andrews

366. “No challenge, no matter how insignificant, can be left unanswered. Even a cry in the wilderness must be acknowledged, because someone might have heard it.”

— Ilona Andrews

367. “Hello, Consort,’’ Mauro boomed. He got to his feet, spread his arms, and curtsied.”

— Ilona Andrews

368. “Adam glanced up. Brown eyes took my measure. He looked just like he did in all those photographs. Okay. Now I needed to not get fried as I talked his handsome ass into surrendering.”

— Ilona Andrews

369. “As I walked back to civilization, I realized that for the first time in the six months I had known Curran, we had managed to have a conversation and part ways without wanting to kill each other. I found that fact deeply troubling.”

— Ilona Andrews

370. “You are not a gentle flower who spends its whole life in a greenhouse. You are a wildfire, Lark. A wildfire.”

— Ilona Andrews

371. “And most of the time, I like being by myself. But when I look into my future, I see no family, no husband, no children. No warmth. I just see myself getting older and more scarred.”

— Ilona Andrews

372. “He’d left for a reason, and I didn’t want to be anyone’s blast from the past. Still, not knowing was worse than any potential awkwardness.”

— Ilona Andrews

373. “Life gives us precious few opportunities to put our best foot forward, so when a chance to shine presents itself, one should always take it.”

— Ilona Andrews

374. “The door swung open and Kate walked in. Her jeans and T-shirt were splattered with blood and she was carrying a severed vampire head. The T-shirt has a smiley face on it.”

— Ilona Andrews

375. “It’s a hunting revolver.” I slumped back. “It’s for big game hunting.” “Texas,” Alessandro said, loading a state’s worth of meaning into a single word.”

— Ilona Andrews

376. “What is going on in your head?” “It’s a dark, lawless place, Catalina. So dark.”

— Ilona Andrews

377. “I raged across the field, killing all before me. They ran when they saw me coming, and I chased them down, and killed them before they could take someone else’s friend away from them.”

— Ilona Andrews

378. “She who showed weakness to teenagers would be picked on to death. True fact of life.”

— Ilona Andrews

379. “Kate Daniels, deadly swordswoman and rescuer of hungry orphans. “Come in. Wash your hands.”

— Ilona Andrews

380. “Enter my lair, said the dragon. I have shiny treasure for you to play with, I’ll keep you warm and safe, and if it suits my purpose, I’ll chain you to the floor and kill your client by throwing quarters at him with my magic. Been there, done that.”

— Ilona Andrews

381. “She pictured him exploding into bloody mist. No. Too quick.”

— Ilona Andrews

382. “Flirt with me now, you sonovabitch! See if I’m impressed.”

— Ilona Andrews

383. “At heart, Curran was a cat. He liked soft things, high places, and enough room to stretch out.”

— Ilona Andrews

384. “Shut up. How was I supposed to know two little bears hurt you, Goldilocks?”

— Ilona Andrews

385. “Did I ever tell you that you are like sunshine in the middle of the night?”

— Ilona Andrews

386. “He had the prettiest hair she had ever seen on a man: dark brown, almost black, and soft like sable, it fell down to his shoulders. She wondered what he’d do if she threw some mud in it. Probably kill her.”

— Ilona Andrews

387. “Mr. Rogan,” I frosted my voice over. “What I put into my body is my business.” Okay, that didn’t sound right.”

— Ilona Andrews

388. “One day you’ll have to choose diplomacy or your spouse. I’m telling you now, it’s got to be your wife. Diplomacy doesn’t care if you live or die. Your wife does.”

— Ilona Andrews

389. “I so didn’t need another outbreak of Rogan fever.”

— Ilona Andrews

390. “She has a high opinion of herself,” Andrea said. “Oh yes. When she gets into a car, her ego has to ride shotgun.”

— Ilona Andrews

391. “To Mother “no” was simply a “yes” that hadn’t had a chance to hear her out.”

— Ilona Andrews

392. “If I have to murder Hugh, I don’t want to do it naked,” he said. “It would be weird.”

— Ilona Andrews

393. “I like problem solving. I like taking a crisis, breaking it into manageable pieces, and finding a solution. I don’t like the minutiae. I don’t like paperwork.” “You.”

— Ilona Andrews

394. “I’m curious, what are you picturing exactly?” Augustine asked. “A crisscrossing pattern of red laser beams and ferrets in harnesses slithering through it like ninjas?”

— Ilona Andrews

395. “Magic could not be measured and explained in scientific terms, for magic grew through destroying the very natural principles that made science as people knew it impossible.”

— Ilona Andrews

396. “He puts himself between evil creatures and small children. He protects us. He is my monster, Commander. Should any rough men come here and try to take what is ours, he will remind them of that.”

— Ilona Andrews

397. “William glanced at her. “Does your sister ground you often?” “No. She mostly does this.” Georgie rolled his eyes in perfect imitation of her and muttered, “Why me?”

— Ilona Andrews

398. “Morfran thrust his axe straight up. He pretty much seemed to have one sign for everything: poke a hole in the sky.”

— Ilona Andrews

399. “The lack of money is the root of all evil, Mr. Meadows.”

— Ilona Andrews

400. “Cuddles screamed. It wasn’t a braying noise, it was an ear-slapping shriek of pure donkey outrage, like someone got hold of a foghorn and tried to strangle it.”

— Ilona Andrews