Top 500 Ilona Andrews Quotes (2025 Update)
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51. “Had he expected me to hump her leg?”

— Ilona Andrews

52. “It’s the way of our universe. A never-ending chain of cannibalism: the stronger prey on the weaker only to become prey in return. The only way to win the game is to not play.”

— Ilona Andrews

53. “Ve haf vays of making you gif us your DNA sample.”

— Ilona Andrews

54. “Football is a wargame of land acquisition.”

— Ilona Andrews

55. “Keeping you safe keeps me in shape.”

— Ilona Andrews

56. “Your master plan has holes big enough to drive a truck through.”

— Ilona Andrews

57. “Any landing you could walk away from was a good landing.”

— Ilona Andrews

58. “What is it? Did Timmy fall down a well?” “Quack!”

— Ilona Andrews

59. “Mercy is defined as kindness or forgiveness given to someone who is within your power to punish. To show mercy means to give up retribution, sometimes at the cost of justice.”

— Ilona Andrews

60. “Ask a man how much a dollar is worth, and he’ll tell you, ‘Almost nothing.’ Try to take a dollar away from him, and you’ll get yourself a fight.”

— Ilona Andrews

61. “Kate Daniels, deadly swordmaster. Fear my twitching pinkie.”

— Ilona Andrews

62. “Okay. I hear you. Be careful what you wish for, Princess.”

— Ilona Andrews

63. “Failure happened. The trick was to accept the risk and try anyway.”

— Ilona Andrews

64. “You’ll always be a bastard. There is a part of you that enjoys kicking the door in and throwing a severed head on the table.”

— Ilona Andrews

65. “Big bad merc, down with a basic hip toss. In your place I’d be blushing.”

— Ilona Andrews

66. “You don’t cause problems. You cause catastrophes.”

— Ilona Andrews

67. “Had records so stellar, they had to lock their resumes in a drawer at night, so the golden light streaming from the pages wouldn’t keep them awake.”

— Ilona Andrews

68. “Never show a weakness; never show pain. The vulnerable get eaten. She would break down later when she was alone, but neither he nor anyone else would ever see it.”

— Ilona Andrews

69. “They called this place Hadramout. It means ’death has arrived.”

— Ilona Andrews

70. “No, I never expect people to be idiots,” George said. “I do expect them to lack some of the necessary information, because experience has demonstrated to me that assuming someone in a key position knows everything you do leads to disaster.”

— Ilona Andrews

71. “The universe was full of wonders. Some of them would drive you insane if you thought about them too long.”

— Ilona Andrews

72. “Sometimes I jump on the table and kick people in the face, but I’m always civil about it.”

— Ilona Andrews

73. “I have a family full of quirky people. Someone has to be sensible so all of you can enjoy being reckless weirdos.”

— Ilona Andrews

74. “I know William,” Kaldar said. “He’s married to my cousin, Cerise, who is more like my baby sister. If her life and happiness were at stake, William would burn the world just to see her smile. Jack is a changeling like William. He would move the earth and the moon to protect his brother. “So.”

— Ilona Andrews

75. “Friends make the world bearable. It’s an honor of sorts. Of all the people that a person knows, they pick you to be their friend, and you try to be worthy of that friendship.”

— Ilona Andrews

76. “The sound of my name in his voice stopped me in midturn. I don’t know how the hell he did it, but whenever he said my name, it cut through all other distractions and made me pause, as if he’d clenched me to him and kissed me.”

— Ilona Andrews

77. “One day, she’d find a way to live her life to the fullest. She was sure of it. She just had no idea how she would manage it.”

— Ilona Andrews

78. “Go home, kiss your wives, hug your children and put your affairs in order, because tomorrow I will burn your neighborhood to the ground. We will kill you, your families, your neighbors, your pets, and anyone who will stand in our path. An attack on my family will not go unpunished.”

— Ilona Andrews

79. “Is this my replacement?” What? “I didn’t replace you!” “Of course not. I’m irreplaceable.”

— Ilona Andrews

80. “She can tell you the height of the attacker from the trigonometry of the blood spatter, while I’m fuzzy on what trigonometry is.”

— Ilona Andrews

81. “I don’t trust tragedies much. It’s easy to make a person sad by showing him something tragic. We all recognize when sad things happen: someone dies, someone loses a loved one, young love is crushed. It’s much harder to make a man laugh-what’s funny to one person isn’t funny to another.”

— Ilona Andrews

82. “Your headlights don’t scare me.”

— Ilona Andrews

83. “Often wrong, but never in doubt. Once you decide what you need to do and how to go about it, you can’t afford to second-guess yourself. You just do it.” The.”

— Ilona Andrews

84. “He bared his teeth in a happy feral grin. My own personal psycho.”

— Ilona Andrews

85. “Strawberry Shortcake called, she wants her outfit back.”

— Ilona Andrews

86. “Go to the Black Sea, meet new people, see beautiful places, get killed by a mutant carnivorous kangaroo goat. One item off my bucket list.”

— Ilona Andrews

87. “I’m going to name him Olasard, after he who hunts the evildoers and rips out their souls.” The Ripper of Souls gave me a befuddled look. I looked at Maud. “There weren’t a lot of kids’ books,” she said.”

— Ilona Andrews

88. “My future chef was an oversized, hysterical hedgehog with a martyr complex.”

— Ilona Andrews

89. “And just when I thought the pain had dulled, my mind would betray me and bring Dad back to life in my dreams. Sometimes I didn’t realize that he was dead until I awoke and then it was like a punch in the stomach. And sometimes I knew in my dream that I was dreaming, and I woke up crying.”

— Ilona Andrews

90. “What do you mean fainted? Took a dive, kissed the pavement. Swooned like a southern belle after her first kiss. Had a dreadful case of the vapors.”

— Ilona Andrews

91. “I can’t believe I have to say this. You there, dashing male secretary! Drop the frying pan.”

— Ilona Andrews

92. “People can snap. People have a limit. And some people are just plain nuts.”

— Ilona Andrews

93. “In a country ruled by a civil majority even the smallest minority enjoys greater protection than a majority living in a country where power is hoarded by select few,” Cornelius said.”

— Ilona Andrews

94. “Life is so precious because it’s short. Even the most resilient people are fragile. Life isn’t about dying or not dying. It’s about living well. Living so you can be proud and happy.”

— Ilona Andrews

95. “But she was funny sometimes, and never boring. God, it would almost be worth it to see her face when she realized that I had saved her ass again. Actually it was quite a nice ass, come to think of it. In fact, my memory of the ass and its owner seemed to be remarkably clear.”

— Ilona Andrews

96. “Technically, the dance worked best when done naked, but I didn’t feel like prancing in the nude into Morrigan Hound’s arms. I’m sure he’d be thrilled to see me.”

— Ilona Andrews

97. “People lie for many reasons: to save themselves, to get out of trouble, to avoid hurting someone’s feelings. Manipulators lie to get what they want. Narcissists lie to make themselves seem grand to others and themselves. Recovering alcoholics lie to safeguard their tattered reputation. And those who love us most lie to us most of all, because life is a bumpy ride and they want to smooth it out as much as possible.”

— Ilona Andrews

98. “If it weren’t for my mother’s sacrifice, I would be Hugh now, sitting here, waiting for a crumb of kindness from someone I’d hurt.”

— Ilona Andrews

99. “Bad days, good days, ‘I’ll cut you if you look at me the wrong way’ days. I’ll take them all.”

— Ilona Andrews

100. “There were bags under my eyes and they weren’t Prada.”

— Ilona Andrews