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Will Rogers Quotes
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Will Rogers Quote: “My forefathers didn’t come over on the Mayflower, but they met the boat.”

My forefathers didn’t come over on the Mayflower, but they met the boat.

— Will Rogers



Will Rogers Quote: “I like to hear a man talk about himself because then I never hear anything, but good.”

I like to hear a man talk about himself because then I never hear anything, but good.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “We Americans think we are pretty good! We want to build a house, we cut down some trees. We want to build a fire, we dig a little coal. But when we run out of all these things, then we will find out just how good we really are.”

We Americans think we are pretty good! We want to build a house, we cut down some trees. We want to build a fire, we dig a little coal. But when we run out of all these things, then we will find out just how good we really are.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “See what will happen if you don’t stop biting your fingernails.”

See what will happen if you don’t stop biting your fingernails.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “I tell you folks, all politics is applesauce.”

I tell you folks, all politics is applesauce.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “And if you call one a real estate agent and he won’t sell you anything. He is a REALATOR. It’s the same as what the old fashioned real estate agent used to be only the commission is different.”

And if you call one a real estate agent and he won’t sell you anything. He is a REALATOR. It’s the same as what the old fashioned real estate agent used to be only the commission is different.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “More words ain’t good for anything in the world only to bring on more argument.”

More words ain’t good for anything in the world only to bring on more argument.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “It don’t take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.”

It don’t take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Polo, racing and horse shows all are doing great work to help the farmer and rancher to raise better horses.”

Polo, racing and horse shows all are doing great work to help the farmer and rancher to raise better horses.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “The Senate just sits and waits till they find out what the president wants, so they know how to vote against him.”

The Senate just sits and waits till they find out what the president wants, so they know how to vote against him.

— Will Rogers



Will Rogers Quote: “In the early days of the Indian Territory, there were no such things as birth certificates. You being there was certificate enough.”

In the early days of the Indian Territory, there were no such things as birth certificates. You being there was certificate enough.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Politics is the best show in America. I love animals and I love politicians, and I like to watch both of ’em at play, either back home in their native state, or after they’ve been captured and sent to a zoo, or to Washington.”

Politics is the best show in America. I love animals and I love politicians, and I like to watch both of ’em at play, either back home in their native state, or after they’ve been captured and sent to a zoo, or to Washington.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “All one has to do to get one’s stuff in the Congressional Record is to find a stenographer that can stay awake long enough to take it down. Then you mark in the ‘Applause’ and ‘Laughter’ parts yourself.”

All one has to do to get one’s stuff in the Congressional Record is to find a stenographer that can stay awake long enough to take it down. Then you mark in the ‘Applause’ and ‘Laughter’ parts yourself.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Andrew Jackson was the first one to think up the idea to promise everybody that if they will vote for you, you will give them an office when you get it, and the more times they vote for you, the bigger the office.”

Andrew Jackson was the first one to think up the idea to promise everybody that if they will vote for you, you will give them an office when you get it, and the more times they vote for you, the bigger the office.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else, but when it happens to you, why it seems to lose some of its Humor, and if it keeps on happening, why the entire laughter kinder Fades out of it.”

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to Somebody Else, but when it happens to you, why it seems to lose some of its Humor, and if it keeps on happening, why the entire laughter kinder Fades out of it.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.”

I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Every time a woman leaves off something she looks better, but every time a man leaves off something he looks worse.”

Every time a woman leaves off something she looks better, but every time a man leaves off something he looks worse.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Technocracy wants to do everything by machinery. Machinery is doing just fine. If it can’t kill you, it will put you out of work.”

Technocracy wants to do everything by machinery. Machinery is doing just fine. If it can’t kill you, it will put you out of work.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “We are the first nation in the history of the world to go to the poorhouse in an automobile.”

We are the first nation in the history of the world to go to the poorhouse in an automobile.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “The time to save is now. When a dog gets a bone, he doesn’t go out and make a down payment on a bigger bone. He buries the one he’s got.”

The time to save is now. When a dog gets a bone, he doesn’t go out and make a down payment on a bigger bone. He buries the one he’s got.

— Will Rogers



Will Rogers Quote: “Take me ham away, take away my eggs, even my Chili, but leave me my newspaper.”

Take me ham away, take away my eggs, even my Chili, but leave me my newspaper.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Foreign relations is an open book – generally a checkbook.”

Foreign relations is an open book – generally a checkbook.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of Congress?”

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of Congress?

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “There are two things I don’t care how smart you are, you will never understand. One is an alienist’s testimony, and the other is a railroad timetable.”

There are two things I don’t care how smart you are, you will never understand. One is an alienist’s testimony, and the other is a railroad timetable.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do well, that’s Memoirs.”

When you put down the good things you ought to have done, and leave out the bad ones you did do well, that’s Memoirs.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Communism is like prohibition, it is a good idea, but it won’t work.”

Communism is like prohibition, it is a good idea, but it won’t work.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “When you get into trouble 5,000 miles from home, you’ve got to have been looking for it.”

When you get into trouble 5,000 miles from home, you’ve got to have been looking for it.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “It looks to me like any man that wants to be President in times like these lacks something.”

It looks to me like any man that wants to be President in times like these lacks something.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “No man can be condemned for owning a dog. As long as he has a dog, he has a friend; and the poorer he gets, the better friend he has.”

No man can be condemned for owning a dog. As long as he has a dog, he has a friend; and the poorer he gets, the better friend he has.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “We are always saying: Let the Law take its Course but what we really mean is: Let the Law take OUR Course.”

We are always saying: Let the Law take its Course but what we really mean is: Let the Law take OUR Course.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Every Harvard class should have one Democrat to rescue it from oblivion.”

Every Harvard class should have one Democrat to rescue it from oblivion.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “If you feel the urge, don’t be afraid to go on a wild goose chase. What do you think wild geese are for anyway?”

If you feel the urge, don’t be afraid to go on a wild goose chase. What do you think wild geese are for anyway?

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “I was just thinking, if it is really religion with these nudist colonies, they sure must turn atheists in the wintertime.”

I was just thinking, if it is really religion with these nudist colonies, they sure must turn atheists in the wintertime.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “That’s what a Congressman or a Senator is for – to see that too much money don’t accumulate in the national Treasury.”

That’s what a Congressman or a Senator is for – to see that too much money don’t accumulate in the national Treasury.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “I bet any Sunday could be made as popular at church as Easter is if you made ’em fashion shows too. The audience is so busy looking at each other that the preacher just as well recite Gunga Din.”

I bet any Sunday could be made as popular at church as Easter is if you made ’em fashion shows too. The audience is so busy looking at each other that the preacher just as well recite Gunga Din.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “There is no argument in the world that carries the hatred that a relioious belief does. The more learned a man is, the less consideration he has for another man’s belief.”

There is no argument in the world that carries the hatred that a relioious belief does. The more learned a man is, the less consideration he has for another man’s belief.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.”

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Baseball is a skilled game. It’s America’s game – it, and high taxes.”

Baseball is a skilled game. It’s America’s game – it, and high taxes.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “There is something about riding down the street on a prancing horse that makes you feel like something, even when you ain’t a thing.”

There is something about riding down the street on a prancing horse that makes you feel like something, even when you ain’t a thing.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “There’s the one thing no nation can ever accuse us of and that is secret diplomacy. Our foreign are an open book, generally a check book.”

There’s the one thing no nation can ever accuse us of and that is secret diplomacy. Our foreign are an open book, generally a check book.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Some guy invented Vitamin A out of a carrot. I’ll bet he can’t invent a good meal out of one.”

Some guy invented Vitamin A out of a carrot. I’ll bet he can’t invent a good meal out of one.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “In politics practically everything you hear is scandal, and besides, the funny thing is that the things they are whispering ain’t half has bad as the things they have been saying right out loud.”

In politics practically everything you hear is scandal, and besides, the funny thing is that the things they are whispering ain’t half has bad as the things they have been saying right out loud.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “When should a college athlete turn pro? Not until he has earned all he can in college as an amateur.”

When should a college athlete turn pro? Not until he has earned all he can in college as an amateur.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what’s going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?”

Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what’s going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.”

If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Lobbyists have more offices in Washington than the President. You see, the President only tells Congress what they should do. Lobbyists tell’em what they will do.”

Lobbyists have more offices in Washington than the President. You see, the President only tells Congress what they should do. Lobbyists tell’em what they will do.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “I doubt if a charging elephant, or a rhino, is as determined or hard to check as a socially ambitious mother.”

I doubt if a charging elephant, or a rhino, is as determined or hard to check as a socially ambitious mother.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “The trouble with our praying is, we just do it as a means of last resort.”

The trouble with our praying is, we just do it as a means of last resort.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “Rail-splitting produced an immortal president in Lincoln, but golf hasn’t produced even a good Congressman.”

Rail-splitting produced an immortal president in Lincoln, but golf hasn’t produced even a good Congressman.

— Will Rogers


Will Rogers Quote: “The bankers just got a good cussing by everybody for loaning too much money. Well, they got some awful nice buildings. So when a banker fails, he fails in splendor.”

The bankers just got a good cussing by everybody for loaning too much money. Well, they got some awful nice buildings. So when a banker fails, he fails in splendor.

— Will Rogers

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