Top 100

Top 450 Darynda Jones Quotes (2024 Update)
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Darynda Jones Quote: “It doesn’t matter what you do, you cannot please everyone. You can write the next Hunger Games and there are going to be people who hate your book with a fiery passion. You just gots to get up, brush yourself off, and start again.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Four out of three people are bad at math.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “This is one Fruit Loop beyond certifiable.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “I had a horrible feeling my leg was broken. If it wasn’t, it had a lot of explaining to do.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Being an adult means never having to show your work on math problems. – T-SHIRT.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance... The five stages of waking up.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “I kept my head down and my breathing steady. No idea why. I totally felt like a sniper in the marines. Only I was pregnant. Other than that, and the fact that I couldn’t snipe if they’d paid me to, I embodied all that a sniper should be. Stealth. Grace. The patience of a panther on the prowl.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Of course I’m an organ donor. Who wouldn’t want a piece of this? – T-SHIRT.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “It takes thirty-three days to write a book – only thirty-three days. remember, writers lie for a living.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “You are the worst greeter in the history of greeters ever. In the history. Of time. And greeters.” “Greeter? You think I’m a greeter?” Talk about a demotion. “Yes. To the other side?” She pointed up. “Dude, calling me a greeter is like calling Saint Peter a ticket taker.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “I have them a few minutes to absorb everything while I teased Ubie, who only had to recover from his near-death experience. I was so glad Reyes hadn’t ripped him to shreds. I liked him much better un-shredded. Unlike, say, my preference for lettuce or heavy metal guitar solos.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Cookie had taken her daughter amber to school then walked the thirty-something feet to work earlier. Our business was on the second floor of Calamity’s, my dad’s bar, which sat right in front of our apartment building. The short commute was nice and rarely invloved rabid raccoons.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “It is sexy in here or is it just me?”
Darynda Jones Quote: “We all have a certain knowledge about how the universe works. And when someone comes along and challenges that knowledge, we don’t know how to deal with it. We aren’t hardwired that way. It’s difficult to question everything you’ve ever thought to be true.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Crazy chicks are usually pretty tough.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Most of what I call “cooking” is just melting cheese on stuff.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “A wine, please.” “Ma’am, this is McDonald’s.” “Okay, a McWine, please.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Anything. Unless it involves math. Four out of three people are bad at math.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Happiness isn’t good enough. I demand euphoria!”
Darynda Jones Quote: “No one could have survived that fall. Not even a supernatural being. Not even the son of Satan. He lay there, unmoving, and I could not wrap my head around it.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “But we’d never really seen eye to eye. Mostly ’cause he was much taller than I was.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “I should’ve known the day was going to turn out bad when it started with my father trying to kill me.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “There is a fine line between love and hate, or haven’t you heard? Sometimes it’s hard to decipher exactly which emotion is strongest.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “I cannot tell you how important fresh, crisp writing is for an aspiring writer. Plot is great. The overall concept is super important. But the writing is what sells your work. It all boils down to the words you choose and the order in which you arrange them.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “You were the one who hit me on the roof? I hit you on the jaw. We just happened to be on a roof at the time.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “But give up my business? The same business I’d built from the ground up with my own two hands and designer Louis Vuittons? The same business for which I’d sacrificed blood, sweat, and tears? Well, maybe not sweat and tears, but there was blood. Lots of blood. Give it up? Not likely. Besides, what else would I do? I totally should’ve gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “A lot of people are alive because I shed too much hair to get away with murder.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “See owner for mounting instructions. – NOVELTY UNDERWEAR.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Make it unique and make it shine.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “When life hands you lemons say, “Lemons? What else have you got?” – bumper sticker.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “You realize that by summoning me here, you signed your own death warrant.” Demons were nothing to take lightly. I’d seen what they were capable of, but I also knew they were no match against the light that shone inside me. “I do,” it said, and I fought to place the language we were speaking. I knew it was ancient. Possibly the first language ever spoken in the universe. “Unless we sign yours first.” “Is that what you think will happen here?” “Dutch,” Reyes said into my ear, “stop playing with your dinner.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Because no being can live in a perfect world. Life is destined to fight to survive. To thrive. To prosper. To have more than the have-nots. All life destroys in order to live.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “I could try to dematerialize and find my way back, but knowing my luck, I’d end up in a terrorist training camp. Or a men’s prison. Or a feminine hygiene commercial.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “It’s 90% imagination and 10% real experiences.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Lord, help me be the sort of person my psychiatrist medicates me to be.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “And that most people would never understand the devastating need of those left behind, the need to know the truth.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Are you ready?” she asked, whispering. “Ready as a drunk virgin on prom night.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “ADD. A lifetime of distractions.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Somebody has to be sane during regular business hours, and it’s not going to be me, missy.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “The FBI had finally wised up and put Charley Davidson on the task of bringing a killer to justice. Because that’s what Charley did. Brought killers to justice. She also found lost dogs, exposed cheating spouses, and tracked down the occasional skip. And she rarely referred to herself in the third person.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Valencia gave Osh a once-over and smirked. I wanted to tell him Osh only looked like a kid, but he’d find that out soon enough. Osh was on him so fast, he was impossible to see. He pinned him against a wall, then lowered his mouth onto the.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “You’re the reason I get up in the morning. That, and I need to pee. – E-CARD.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “I was more than willing to put aside the Charley Davidson Book of Etiquette and Mud Wrestling if it resulted in earth-shattering orgasms.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Grab me a chib, wifey. Shite’s about to get real.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “I wouldnae refuse a square go, but I’d best warn ye, I’m solid.” It.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “I watched as Reyes fell, a scream I couldn’t hear wrenched from my throat as I waited for him to do something. For him to react. To save himself. It was Reyes, after all. He could do anything.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Damn it, I needed The Idiot’s Guide to Grim Reaperism.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “It would be a miracle to solve this case. Luckily, I believed in miracles. No, wait, that was testicles. I believed in testicles.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “We are all searching for someone whose demons play well with ours. – BUMPER STICKER.”
Darynda Jones Quote: “Clothes? sufficient Keys? found ’em Coffee cup? full Sanity? sanity? – T-SHIRT.”
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