Top 450 Darynda Jones Quotes (2025 Update)
Page 6 of 10

251. “Cookie’s cousin Lucille, for example. Or her second cousins. Or her uncle on her mother’s side. Her whole family, in fact, was a Harvard study waiting to happen.”

— Darynda Jones

252. “I made a decision long ago not to make any apologies. Romance rocks, and even though my books don’t actually fall into the romance genre, I tout them as very much being about the romance. It’s fun. We’re all obsessed with it. And it’s human nature. Remember, NO APOLOGIES! Write what ’s in your heart!”

— Darynda Jones

253. “Just because I see dead people doesn’t mean I want to be dead people.”

— Darynda Jones

254. “I watched as Reyes fell, a scream I couldn’t hear wrenched from my throat as I waited for him to do something. For him to react. To save himself. It was Reyes, after all. He could do anything.”

— Darynda Jones

255. “What you should be asking yourself,” he said, indicating Mr. Wong with a nod as the departed man hovered in my corner, “is why a being that ungodly powerful is hanging out in your apartment.”

— Darynda Jones

256. “Are you ready?” she asked, whispering. “Ready as a drunk virgin on prom night.”

— Darynda Jones

257. “ADD. A lifetime of distractions.”

— Darynda Jones

258. “You only need to find yourself. Everything else can be Googled. – Meme.”

— Darynda Jones

259. “Somebody has to be sane during regular business hours, and it’s not going to be me, missy.”

— Darynda Jones

260. “What in the name of Zeus’s testicles?”

— Darynda Jones

261. “The FBI had finally wised up and put Charley Davidson on the task of bringing a killer to justice. Because that’s what Charley did. Brought killers to justice. She also found lost dogs, exposed cheating spouses, and tracked down the occasional skip. And she rarely referred to herself in the third person.”

— Darynda Jones

262. “Valencia gave Osh a once-over and smirked. I wanted to tell him Osh only looked like a kid, but he’d find that out soon enough. Osh was on him so fast, he was impossible to see. He pinned him against a wall, then lowered his mouth onto the.”

— Darynda Jones

263. “If each day is a gift, can I return last Monday?”

— Darynda Jones

264. “I love language, words, and all the lovely, exciting, and heart wrenching things you can do with them. Pick the right ones, put them in the right order, and you’ve created a moment in time where the reader forgets about the late car payment, the dirty dishes, the impending workweek. You have created a state of bliss. Or negligence, depending on your perspective.”

— Darynda Jones

265. “Charley Davidson, Private Investigator, Because No One Is Better At Investigating Your Privates.”

— Darynda Jones

266. “Showers were God’s reward for working hard enough to get dirty.”

— Darynda Jones

267. “I didn’t realize until I locked the door to my apartment and leaned against it, panting that my cheeks were covered in frozen tears. I was such an idiot. And my heart hurt. Bad. Every beat sent an ache rocketing through my body. I was having a heart attack. Or, more likely, my heart had just broken.”

— Darynda Jones

268. “Her dad shows up, and instead of getting mad at Denise, he wraps his arm around her and helps her to his car like she’s crippled. I could’ve crippled her. Missed my chance.”

— Darynda Jones

269. “While the goal of a book is to create a positive emotional experience for the reader, the goal of the opening is to set the stage, to pull the reader in.”

— Darynda Jones

270. “I’d tried to be washed of my sin once, but I ran out of Dial. Tricky business, that.”

— Darynda Jones

271. “Thrilled that Reyes and I were outside, and taking that as her cue to get her freak on, Artemis ran around like a gerbil on meth, turning occasionally to make sure we were still watching. And God help us if we weren’t.”

— Darynda Jones

272. “There are two night guards here, and I’m not sure which one is on duty. If it’s the female, Garrett’s on. If it’s the male, this whole thing will rest in your hands, Osh.”

— Darynda Jones

273. “I tried to roll out of Reyes’s arms. He tightened his hold. I tried to lift an arm off me, but he clasped his fingers, essentially locking me in. “Reyes,” I said, stifling a giggle, “I know you’re awake. You can give up the game.” “Never,” he said into his pillow.”

— Darynda Jones

274. “You almost exploded. Which, thank goodness, you didn’t. You’d never have come out of Garrett’s carpet.”

— Darynda Jones

275. “The horror that riveted through me, the absolute terror with a taint of nausea, stunned me speechless for three, maybe four seconds. I put the mug down and made a cross with my fingers, screaming, “Death before decaf!” as Garrett poured himself a cup. The fool.”

— Darynda Jones

276. “You look like heaven,” he said. “That’s weird, because you look like hell.”

— Darynda Jones

277. “Osh, we are going to have to tie you up and torture you. Sorry.” “Really?” He stood and removed his top hat, a broad grin splitting his perfect face. With the enthusiasm of a virgin at a brothel, he slapped his hands together and rubbed them in anticipation. “Where do you want me?” Osh sat down and Garrett began the bondage process. Was it wrong that I had a hankering for gay porn at that moment?”

— Darynda Jones

278. “Damn it, I needed The Idiot’s Guide to Grim Reaperism.”

— Darynda Jones

279. “It would be a miracle to solve this case. Luckily, I believed in miracles. No, wait, that was testicles. I believed in testicles.”

— Darynda Jones

280. “I’m like crack. People don’t want to like me, but once they get a taste, they always come back for more.”

— Darynda Jones

281. “Clothes? sufficient Keys? found ’em Coffee cup? full Sanity? sanity? – T-SHIRT.”

— Darynda Jones

282. “I was starting to wonder if repetitive exposure to nightly hallucinations resulting in earth-shattering climaxes could have any long-term side effects.”

— Darynda Jones

283. “Love was not only blind, it often careened into Blithering Idiotsville as well.”

— Darynda Jones

284. “Death via extreme pleasure was a serious concern.”

— Darynda Jones

285. “Even from a distance you burn, you scorch anyone who gets too close.”

— Darynda Jones

286. “His gaze rested on my mouth before making its way to my eyes again. “You could ask for the world, and then where would civilization be when I conquered it and laid it at your feet?”

— Darynda Jones

287. “Depression really did make a person want to sleep all the time. Who knew?”

— Darynda Jones

288. “Never underestimate the power of a woman on a double espresso with a mocha latte chaser high.”

— Darynda Jones

289. “We don’t read to observe the character from a distance. We read to become the character and experience the conflicts and rewards they are experiencing.”

— Darynda Jones

290. “And just how, exactly, do you feed off the souls of humans? Is it like a vitamin-deficiency thing?”

— Darynda Jones

291. “As far as superpowers went, if a vengeful madman hopped up on 24-Hour Sudafed and wielding a broadsword named Thor’s Morning Wood ever attacked us, we were screwed. Six ways to Sunday.”

— Darynda Jones

292. “Justice may be blind, but she was an awesome elixir.”

— Darynda Jones

293. “This situation nailed why reality TV was such a hit. The human appetite to witness tragedy, to observe the subtle difference between pain and anguish, to see each emotion twist the features of a normally smiling face, was irresistible. It wasn’t their fault. A certain amount of morbidity was innate in each of us, part of our biological makeup, our DNA.”

— Darynda Jones

294. “I stretched as those three little words that every girl longs to hear slipped from his mouth with effortless ease. As though they did it every day. As Though they didn’t mean the world to me. With one corner of his mouth tipping sensually, he asked, “Want some coffee?” And I fell. I fell hard.”

— Darynda Jones

295. “That Reyes Farrow boy.”

— Darynda Jones

296. “Amador and Bianca have a great life that I’m only a little jealous of. They have two kids they bring to see me. His daughter, Ashlee, is almost five now. She has asked me to marry her when I get out. It feels kind of weird since she calls me Uncle Reyes and incest is frowned upon, but who am I to argue with true love?”

— Darynda Jones

297. “I also become the local computer nerd. The administration brings me in to fix all the computers, I create viruses to invade at a specific day and time. They call me in, and I eradicate my own virus, only to plant another one to go into effect a couple months later. They ask me why I can’t just fix the computers once and for all. I tell them to quit going to porn sites and it will stay fixed. That shuts them up every time.”

— Darynda Jones

298. “WHILE writing, just try to have fun with your ms. Enjoy the process, but push on. Always push toward the finish line!”

— Darynda Jones

299. “I can hear other things, too. Before you came around, I had no idea a man could make a girl scream like that. Reyes seems very talented.”

— Darynda Jones

300. “Hey, I could be your assistant! I’d be an Assistant Serial Killer Serial Killer. I’d be an Ass. Or do I need the Ks in there? Because that wouldn’t sound nearly as cool.”

— Darynda Jones